Hi. Assalamualaikum.
So I've just arrive here, after a long time. Now, it's exam period and this semester I got 5 papers to be handled. Not too exhausted, maybe because I'm already used to it, so I'm just bored. This semester, I think my pointer will drop down (nauuzubillahh) bcos I think I did too many sins and bad deed. Also, I'm too dilly-dally and doing things half-heartedly. My souls turn sour and I lose too many hope. I live a bad life (as I reflected back), this semester.
And as I growing up here, I just come to a refreshed conclusion about myself. I am a robot-like. Some time ago, I thought I am just a girl who a bit blur about some issues though I am aware about it. But, after some time I was commented by someone who is far superior than me, that I do things as been programmed. Or in other word, naive or 'lurus bendul', straight like a ruler. He commented in front of the people and as I thought, people make fun of me. But, I dont blame him or other people because that is the truth, it is just he chose to become straightforward about it (though by saying it in front of others). At first, I was making a reason that I do things as been ordered because I though that it is something me and other people ought to do aside from making things easier, but then I realized, there are another reason that I do things as been ordered. It is because I am naive. I don't think we have a choice because I lack of experience and courage. There's so many times things happen like this.
Aside of that, I think by denying it or avoiding things that are assigned or planned for me is more troubling and make things hard. I should save my inner and outer energy to something better than this. That is what I think. Also, in another issue, I find that I have different idea or reasoning than other people. It is not that I am creative or what (as I said earlier, I am a robot-like. I do and think things that I have an experience or things that I learned from many source, most of them from other's behaviors. And yeah, most of my learning are just like B.F Skinner's theory, defined it). My thinking is difference because in my childhood I had a difference experience than others, and I assimilate it with the present situations. For an example, my parents love to buy books, magazines, and articles (in some brochure or something), then I like to rummage things such as cupboard, bookshelf, cabinets, or things that have room in it. And I love it when I found things that I got to read. As for a magazine for adults, they have many sections such as for article about current issue, tips, illustrated comic, short stories, and literature. First, when I was five years old (first time I was able to read), I will read the illustrated comic first (on all of the books and magazines). Then when I was 9 or 10, I start to read the short story or narrated stories (of all the things). And as I growing up and can understand things better, I finished all the sections of all the magazines, that's how I build my thinking. And I was amazed by the things around me through reading, and what made me wondered more is about the materials. Like, the books and magazines that were bought by my parents, the contents were far ahead time (I know this because the ideas or issues that were stated and discussed at that time cannot be accepted by majorities, yet now people start to talk about it as it is a new things). The materials (books etc) also was limited because long ago, people did not lookup or care about those things.
I'm also love to explore and copying things that I read or watch to see what result can it produces. Therewith, I build my own perceptions and conclusion. Still, it just end like that. Nothing can be produced as an actions. At the end, it just happen in my mind. Maybe that's why I always make things complicated and tend to over-think.
Also, I am always hated an introvert. Because, why can't you just speak up your mind (but I know the answer - it takes too much inner energy) and I hate to explain things. I love to give a simple words as a clue or cue. But, that 's also the reason I hate introvert. Because sometimes it contradict to the other tendency, like exploring things, ideas, places and people. Hahah.. about people, I love to observe them. Like how some situations been handled by them or how things make them reacted. Through this, I learned how to socialize with people. If I'm staying at other people's house, I feel comfortable if they treat me not as a guest, I just want to understand their life. Like, it is okay if you don't want to bring me to interesting places (like a visitor). I'm happy enough if you just live your daily life, as usual. Cause I can know you just like this. It is just like this, okay.
Okay, I lost my track again. What was I talking about at first? Hmm... I know it, it just like me. Absorbed into somethings else and forgetting derived purposed. Whatever. to be continue (though I don't know when)
Wednesday, May 03, 2017
Sunday, November 13, 2016
Rant
So, it's already 0104 and I can't put myself to sleep again. It had become my habit to sleep at this late since this semester. The earliest hour that I go to bed usually at 0000. But my daily life aren't productive as ever though. I am thinking for a change. Change in lifestyle, to renew daily and life goals and try to fulfill it as this is my prime time in my life where I've been blessed with energy, chances, family, friends, and other things that can't be certain in lifetime ahead. This countless blessing that I've been bestowed by Him need to be grateful. Hm.. I'm leading my now-life aware of this yet no action has been taken to show Him my gratefulness.
I've tried my best every night before going to sleep to plan my tomorrow life productively or beneficial to me and others yet my imagination has courted me to another situation that is ridiculously could be happen in life. Such dramatically and unrealistically scenes and circumstances that cause me to forget my to do list and other responsibilities and duties I had to make for the next day. Actually, every day's scenes in my life bear a big nor little scope of imagination that can turn me a little excited inside whether it could result for unpleasant or rejoice feels. That sometimes it had draws me to talk discreetly (read: comments) about it, all by myself. Me talking alone (hushedly) is one of my characters. It also had resulted me to overthink about sometime and made a fuss for it ....by myself.
--------------------------
Actually, my smartphone has gone out of service and I had to use my old phone (act it was my sisters') that cant be used to access Internet. Only call and message. But, thanks to that I can focused more on my study, though. Hahahaha... at least my temptation to run away from this study's duty had lessen. But the disadvantages is I can't contact my Umie often and can't shared my daily routine report to my family group XD. hahahaa... anyway, I tried to take it in a positive way and try to make some benefit from it.
And also, my lapptop has been acting very ill lately. The problem has worsen. Before this it will only go into sleep mode and can be revived after a while, but now, it would shut down not long after it went to the sleep mode. Allah knew best if this isnt in my assignments weeks, I must go not far from crazy to fix this things up. I've been holding up this problem for so long for many excuses I'd made for I can't be parted from this electronic things for I thought I may have some needs to be done from it.
But I think it is my personality that had caused all of this things. Same goes to my dental record and my health progress. I cant seem to act immediately if it hasnt caused me some drastic awfully change that interrupt my routine.
Oh.. how I hope I can change this rotten personality..
--------------------------
Now, my nearest determination instead of study for next papers is writing some good stories or sketching ideas for a few scenes to be put into the story, at least.
--------------------------
Maybe it's time for me to sleep, hmmm.. seriously.
Anyway, I've done my TMKS3053 paper today, and I thought 'Oh..poor'
...
Night .
I've tried my best every night before going to sleep to plan my tomorrow life productively or beneficial to me and others yet my imagination has courted me to another situation that is ridiculously could be happen in life. Such dramatically and unrealistically scenes and circumstances that cause me to forget my to do list and other responsibilities and duties I had to make for the next day. Actually, every day's scenes in my life bear a big nor little scope of imagination that can turn me a little excited inside whether it could result for unpleasant or rejoice feels. That sometimes it had draws me to talk discreetly (read: comments) about it, all by myself. Me talking alone (hushedly) is one of my characters. It also had resulted me to overthink about sometime and made a fuss for it ....by myself.
--------------------------
Actually, my smartphone has gone out of service and I had to use my old phone (act it was my sisters') that cant be used to access Internet. Only call and message. But, thanks to that I can focused more on my study, though. Hahahaha... at least my temptation to run away from this study's duty had lessen. But the disadvantages is I can't contact my Umie often and can't shared my daily routine report to my family group XD. hahahaa... anyway, I tried to take it in a positive way and try to make some benefit from it.
And also, my lapptop has been acting very ill lately. The problem has worsen. Before this it will only go into sleep mode and can be revived after a while, but now, it would shut down not long after it went to the sleep mode. Allah knew best if this isnt in my assignments weeks, I must go not far from crazy to fix this things up. I've been holding up this problem for so long for many excuses I'd made for I can't be parted from this electronic things for I thought I may have some needs to be done from it.
But I think it is my personality that had caused all of this things. Same goes to my dental record and my health progress. I cant seem to act immediately if it hasnt caused me some drastic awfully change that interrupt my routine.
Oh.. how I hope I can change this rotten personality..
--------------------------
Now, my nearest determination instead of study for next papers is writing some good stories or sketching ideas for a few scenes to be put into the story, at least.
--------------------------
Maybe it's time for me to sleep, hmmm.. seriously.
Anyway, I've done my TMKS3053 paper today, and I thought 'Oh..poor'
...
Night .
Thursday, November 10, 2016
Teringin nak sambung menulis
Assalamualaikum. Hai, ingat kembali masa dulu-dulu..ya, masa dulu-dulu.. Dikala masih mentah dan penuh dengan imaginasi yang menggian. Hahaha... sekarang pun penuh dengan imaginasi lagi. Bertambah-tambah kot. Dulu masa form 3 form 4 suka, banyak sangat benda yang diteroka macam edit gambar, video, tuils cerita. Rasa macam banyak sangat benda yang dibuat. Tapi sekarang rasa yang membuak-buak tu ditutup dengan gaya hidup sebagai seorang pelajar IPTA (hmm.. IPG ni IPTA lah jugak kan).
Tapi bila baca artikel, novel, drama dan sebagainya, imaginasi tu kembali bertambah-tambah sampai rasa nak tulis cerita balik. Dulu aku pernah tulis cerita dan post dekat blog yang memang aku khaskan untuk cerita. Tapi sampai 7 bab saja sebab dah tak ada motivasi. (Dan tengah stress sebab study, dulu masa sekolah memang selalu stress yang depression tu, nangis2 sepanjang masa) sampai hilang semangat nak menulis. Lepas tu, terus delete cerita tu sampai blog sekali delete. Kakak aku sangatlah marah bila tengok aku delete cerita dan blog tu sekali. Dia banyak bagi rangsangan kata cerita tu sebenarnya ada je peminat yang tersendiri dan dia salah seorang peminat cerita tu. Aku tak ingat apa tajuk yang aku letak tapi bukan cerita anak dato ke apa dan kakak aku tu salah seorang peminat tegar untuk cerita aku tu. Memang dia selalu je cakap, sambunglah cerita dan kami akan buat cerita dan saling bertukar-tukar baca. Dia pun ada tulis jugak cuma progressnya agak lambat berbanding kalau aku yang tulis. Tapi aku pun macam malas jugak sebab nak tumpu pada study (walaupun sebenarnya aku dah jumpa minat lain masa tu iaitu JPOP fandom).
Tapi bila aku nak retrieve balik blog tu, dah terlambat sebab blogspot dan remove sepenuhnya blog tu. (Kan biasanya kalau delete sesebuah blog, untuk sesuatu tempoh, blogspot akan simpan lagi, tapi kalau dah lama terus delete). Jadi lepas tu aku agak menyesal la sebab banyak idea yang aku dah karang dan untuk buat balik perlu idea asal yang banyak scene yang aku buat agak bersangkut paut dengan scene seterusnya.
Untuk buat cerita sekarang, aku sangat ambil berat pasal reason atau sebab bagi sesebuah scene dan maklumat pasal sesuatu benda. Contohnya kalau aku nak buat cerita yang ada watak peguam dalam tu, aku rasa perlu untuk kaji bagaimana skop kerja peguam, bagaimana hidup dia, komunikasi dan pergaulan untuk aku cipta satu scene mengenainya sebab aku sangatlah skeptikal dan curiga pada suatu babak yang aku tak tahu macam mana perlunya berlaku. Contoh lain macam pasal latar tempat, walaupun tempat tu umum, aku perlu gambarkan secara terperinci dan tepat supaya babak yang dicipta untuk latar tempat, waktu dan masyarakat atau orang sekeliling tu kelihatan realistik dan aku sebagai pembaca contohnya tak sakit hati kalau benda tu salah. Hmm.. kesimpulannya aku sangat cerewet dalam penulisan ni. Walaupun cerita tu fiksyen iaitu sekadar rekaan, tapi faktor-faktor macam tu sangat memberi kesan pada aku sebagai orang yang menulis lebih-lebih lagi sebagai pembaca.
Sebab tu sampai sekarang aku masih stuck untuk menulis. Masa muda, my imagination really run very wild dan macam-macam idea boleh timbul. Sekarang, I've been really logical and realistic even more than my teen days.
Tapi sekarang rasa nak menulis tu membuak-buak bila baca banyak novel dan penulisan. One of my favorite or current reading right now is an English novel which is Anne of Green Gables. I've really grow my fond toward this series. Then I searched more about the novel and became to know the others series also. And it tempts me to find and read all of those collections. Really, Montgomery works had captivate my heart. Rasa nak download cerita, beli semua novel. Walaupun bahasa yang digunakan agak susah, a little peotric (ye ke, istilah ni).. tapi watak Anne sangat unik dan menarik, perjalanan hidup dia sangat memberi inspirasi. Cara penulisan Montgomery jugak sangat detail that the circle grows from Green Gable to Avonlea and through the entire island and more until I feel that Anne really exist.
Baiklah, mungkin suatu hari nanti atau cuti semester ni, aku akan start balik menulis.
Alright, this may end now. ahhaha
Tapi bila baca artikel, novel, drama dan sebagainya, imaginasi tu kembali bertambah-tambah sampai rasa nak tulis cerita balik. Dulu aku pernah tulis cerita dan post dekat blog yang memang aku khaskan untuk cerita. Tapi sampai 7 bab saja sebab dah tak ada motivasi. (Dan tengah stress sebab study, dulu masa sekolah memang selalu stress yang depression tu, nangis2 sepanjang masa) sampai hilang semangat nak menulis. Lepas tu, terus delete cerita tu sampai blog sekali delete. Kakak aku sangatlah marah bila tengok aku delete cerita dan blog tu sekali. Dia banyak bagi rangsangan kata cerita tu sebenarnya ada je peminat yang tersendiri dan dia salah seorang peminat cerita tu. Aku tak ingat apa tajuk yang aku letak tapi bukan cerita anak dato ke apa dan kakak aku tu salah seorang peminat tegar untuk cerita aku tu. Memang dia selalu je cakap, sambunglah cerita dan kami akan buat cerita dan saling bertukar-tukar baca. Dia pun ada tulis jugak cuma progressnya agak lambat berbanding kalau aku yang tulis. Tapi aku pun macam malas jugak sebab nak tumpu pada study (walaupun sebenarnya aku dah jumpa minat lain masa tu iaitu JPOP fandom).
Tapi bila aku nak retrieve balik blog tu, dah terlambat sebab blogspot dan remove sepenuhnya blog tu. (Kan biasanya kalau delete sesebuah blog, untuk sesuatu tempoh, blogspot akan simpan lagi, tapi kalau dah lama terus delete). Jadi lepas tu aku agak menyesal la sebab banyak idea yang aku dah karang dan untuk buat balik perlu idea asal yang banyak scene yang aku buat agak bersangkut paut dengan scene seterusnya.
Untuk buat cerita sekarang, aku sangat ambil berat pasal reason atau sebab bagi sesebuah scene dan maklumat pasal sesuatu benda. Contohnya kalau aku nak buat cerita yang ada watak peguam dalam tu, aku rasa perlu untuk kaji bagaimana skop kerja peguam, bagaimana hidup dia, komunikasi dan pergaulan untuk aku cipta satu scene mengenainya sebab aku sangatlah skeptikal dan curiga pada suatu babak yang aku tak tahu macam mana perlunya berlaku. Contoh lain macam pasal latar tempat, walaupun tempat tu umum, aku perlu gambarkan secara terperinci dan tepat supaya babak yang dicipta untuk latar tempat, waktu dan masyarakat atau orang sekeliling tu kelihatan realistik dan aku sebagai pembaca contohnya tak sakit hati kalau benda tu salah. Hmm.. kesimpulannya aku sangat cerewet dalam penulisan ni. Walaupun cerita tu fiksyen iaitu sekadar rekaan, tapi faktor-faktor macam tu sangat memberi kesan pada aku sebagai orang yang menulis lebih-lebih lagi sebagai pembaca.
Sebab tu sampai sekarang aku masih stuck untuk menulis. Masa muda, my imagination really run very wild dan macam-macam idea boleh timbul. Sekarang, I've been really logical and realistic even more than my teen days.
Tapi sekarang rasa nak menulis tu membuak-buak bila baca banyak novel dan penulisan. One of my favorite or current reading right now is an English novel which is Anne of Green Gables. I've really grow my fond toward this series. Then I searched more about the novel and became to know the others series also. And it tempts me to find and read all of those collections. Really, Montgomery works had captivate my heart. Rasa nak download cerita, beli semua novel. Walaupun bahasa yang digunakan agak susah, a little peotric (ye ke, istilah ni).. tapi watak Anne sangat unik dan menarik, perjalanan hidup dia sangat memberi inspirasi. Cara penulisan Montgomery jugak sangat detail that the circle grows from Green Gable to Avonlea and through the entire island and more until I feel that Anne really exist.
Baiklah, mungkin suatu hari nanti atau cuti semester ni, aku akan start balik menulis.
Alright, this may end now. ahhaha
Thursday, November 03, 2016
Just like falling in love
So a few days back, i came from my hometown to KL as a transit before going to Malacca through airplane. This is my first time to board on Air Asia and second time with an airplane. So the experience I had was very nice and I could tell like I had fall in love, being so thrilled. It is because last time when I board on Rayani Air, I couldn't have a seat next to the window so I can't feel the excitement very well *as if it was actually*. So this time, to be honest I was actually taking other people seat but when the person came, I had politely ask her for the seat and luckily she was nice enough to swap with me. hahahaha....
And the leg room was a bit spacious too than I had imagine as previously when I boarded RA, it was quite cramped that I felt my leg could slogged up. Also in one row, they have 4 seats compared with AA (3 seats). For an economy class, this was comfortable enough *because I travelled for only an hour from KB to KL* and the staff was very kind and considerate. I said this because from what I heard before, to help passanger on lifting baggage/luggage into the cabin wasn't one of their duty but they voluntarily help all of us (the passangers) to put them up. Hmm.. maybe they want to make things go smoothly and accordingly. Imagine if all the passangers just stacked all of the luggage/baggage/stuff into the cabin and make things worse than it should be. It will undoubtedly cause them great trouble later. still, I appreciate their assistance.
Oh, actually my flight was delayed one hour from the schedule as it should departed at 1430. So I arrived at the KLIA2 at 1640, a bit late for my friend to wait for us at the airport.
What I'm trying to tell on this post actually the feeling of mine when the plane start to take off. It gives me this thrilled and excited feels. And it felt very nice like I could fall in love with it. Looking at the airplane's wing and the scenery when the airplane start to turn into other direction, I can't stop myself from smiling and giggling *silently*. I am weird, a queer one I realize. This feeling though not very strong but had a similarity when I board on the train. Oh also public bus. I guess I do love public transportation. I'm the type of person who love common things to be imagined in different ways. Like walking in same route everyday may be boring to some people but I find it interesting *as being blessed* when I think that many people don't experience it in a way I does.
But, the feelings when staying in the fuselage was very tempting that I'm dying to have another session with it.
So far, the situation when this feelings arose was when I know I had a chance to go to Japan *although at the last stage, I failed* and when I got to see my honey bunch sugar plump Bocchan that I don't know how to express my loveliest, excitement, and whatsoever feelings that even hugging and kissing him won't be enough. So yeah, this is another new experience that I'm dying to have it again.
Alright, that's all for this post. Need to revise for my exam next week. Bye.
And the leg room was a bit spacious too than I had imagine as previously when I boarded RA, it was quite cramped that I felt my leg could slogged up. Also in one row, they have 4 seats compared with AA (3 seats). For an economy class, this was comfortable enough *because I travelled for only an hour from KB to KL* and the staff was very kind and considerate. I said this because from what I heard before, to help passanger on lifting baggage/luggage into the cabin wasn't one of their duty but they voluntarily help all of us (the passangers) to put them up. Hmm.. maybe they want to make things go smoothly and accordingly. Imagine if all the passangers just stacked all of the luggage/baggage/stuff into the cabin and make things worse than it should be. It will undoubtedly cause them great trouble later. still, I appreciate their assistance.
Oh, actually my flight was delayed one hour from the schedule as it should departed at 1430. So I arrived at the KLIA2 at 1640, a bit late for my friend to wait for us at the airport.
 |
| this exact moment |
 |
| common and nice |
What I'm trying to tell on this post actually the feeling of mine when the plane start to take off. It gives me this thrilled and excited feels. And it felt very nice like I could fall in love with it. Looking at the airplane's wing and the scenery when the airplane start to turn into other direction, I can't stop myself from smiling and giggling *silently*. I am weird, a queer one I realize. This feeling though not very strong but had a similarity when I board on the train. Oh also public bus. I guess I do love public transportation. I'm the type of person who love common things to be imagined in different ways. Like walking in same route everyday may be boring to some people but I find it interesting *as being blessed* when I think that many people don't experience it in a way I does.
But, the feelings when staying in the fuselage was very tempting that I'm dying to have another session with it.
So far, the situation when this feelings arose was when I know I had a chance to go to Japan *although at the last stage, I failed* and when I got to see my honey bunch sugar plump Bocchan that I don't know how to express my loveliest, excitement, and whatsoever feelings that even hugging and kissing him won't be enough. So yeah, this is another new experience that I'm dying to have it again.
Alright, that's all for this post. Need to revise for my exam next week. Bye.
Sunday, October 23, 2016
Outing Routine Turn Like Others
Assalamualaikum. Hai~
Sekarang nak cerita pasal outing semalam kat Aeon Bandaraya Melaka. Sebenarnya biasa je outing sini tapi sebab ada event2 tertentu, rasa nak cerita pulak. Kebetulan sehari sebelumnya (Jumaat) is my roomate birthday. So, ingatkan nak outing hari Jumaat beli kek ke apa untuk beliau. *hahhaha*.. tapi sebabnya si pengajaknya rasa agak letih dan malas *including me*, kami tangguh ke esoknya. Jadi esoknya ingatkan nak ajak birthday girl (Anis) keluar sekali lepas habis program kelab dia, tapi kami (Aiza, K.Sirah, K.Mirah & Fadh) tak cakap la nak sambut birthday, cakap nak keluar makan je, tapi beliau taknak sebab dah makan masa kat program dan siap ada bekal lunch lagi, so taknak keluar, jadi kami berlima ni jelah keluar, kira balik bawak kek je lah kan. Then, lepas Zohor je kami bersiap keluar. Mula-mula ingat nak pergi Tesco je, tapi entah macam mana, secara ad hoc, terus turun kat Aeon. hahahah
Sampai je kat Aeon, tengok ramai jugak orang sebab ada banyak promosi kat Aeon. Hahahahha.. sekarang kan hujung bulan, jadi banyak promosi. Tapi kami teruskan je cari tempat nak makan, tapi on the way pilih tempat nak makan, kami nampak macam ada pameran je kat dalam tengah Aeon tu, rupanya ada mini exhibition yang bertajuk The Best Of You. Jadi, kami masuklah, tengok-tengok. Nasib baik free je semua ni. Pameran ni pasal pengalaman atau perkongsian tentang pengunjung pameran ni atau siapa2 je yang berkongsikan cerita atau life view about something that came within themself. Macam sesuatu yang boleh menginspirasikan diri sendiri dan orang lain. It's a good thing that come from good people.
Dan, pihak pameran juga kutip perkongsian tu dari pengunjung yang datang ke pameran ni. Mereka bagi poskad untuk kita tulis apa yang kita nak kongsikan dan ambil gambar untuk dilekatkan kat poskad tu. Jadi kami tak lepaskan peluang untuk buat ucapan birthday for our friend dan lekatkan kat sini. Tapi kami ambil dua poskad, satu untuk birthday, satu untuk friendship *hmm... ye kot macam ni*. Lepas tulis tu, pihak pameran ambil gambar kami dan print dan bagi satu salinan untuk kami. Poskad tu kemudian kami gantung kat situ. Semua ni percuma saja. Memang pengalaman yang sangat menarik sebab kita boleh baca pengalaman dan perkongsian orang lain yang sangat orang kata give a good vibes and help us to view this world better by knowing everyone have their own hardship and this world is full of something that we don't know yet something nice are there for us to explore. It leaves me with very good impression.
Lepas tengok pameran situ, kami pun mula cari tempat nak makan. Baru sedar yang perut dah sangat lapar. Mula-mula ingat nak makan kat KFC sebab biasanya nasi dia agak mengenyangkan, tapi lepas lalu depan Sukiya rasa macam nak try sebab sebelum ni rasa tak berani, tapi sebab rasa macam nak explore something new, masukla jugak walaupun risau takut tak sedap and takut tak padan dengan harga. Tapi harga dia standard je, boleh tahan. Aku, Aiza ngan K.Sirah pun masuklah nak cuba. Lama jugak dok tilik menu, dalam 15 minit gitu, sebab konfius sangat nak pilih menu, takut tak sedap lah, itulah, inilah Orang lain dah siap makan baru kami siap pilih. Hahahaha... Lastly, aku pilih set gyudon and curry. Aiza pilih spicy gyudon apa ntah dengan ice lemon tea. K.Sirah pun pilih yang spicy gyudon tambah karaage dengan ice lemon tea. Aku pulak pilih set gyudon dengan curry with iced green tea. Dua2 nasi. tak sedar pun. Lepas order baru trnampak, spatutnya pilih ramen dengan curry, je. Tapi tak apa lah.
Sebenarnya semua menu yang diambil tu, semua yang small size, tapi sangat kenyang. Rasa macam sampai malam pun kenyang ni *hakikatnya malam tu lapar balik jugak sebab perut 4D macam doremon, kena sumbat banyak*. Tapi seriously, gyudon which is actually nasi dengan daging, nasi tersangatla lembut dan tak ada lah melekit sangat tapi tak ada lah berderai macam nasi biasa tu. Sedap sangat, dan daging pulak sangat chewy, tak keras dan mudah nak kunyah. Curry pulak macam yang malaysia style, jadi sedap lah jugak. Kena dengan tekak orang kata. Miso soup dengan mushroom pun sedap, boleh tahan. Dan dia bagi sayur macam kimchi gitu. not exactly kimchi, tapi macam sayur jeruk la jugak. sedap. overall, berbaloi la jugak. lain kali nak datang nak try yang ramen pulak. Set yang aku makan rm15.90, okeylah. standard.
Lepas tu, kami pun start cari kek. Mula-mula ingat nak beli kek birthday, tapi bila tengok harga dan jenis dia, macam hmmmm... tak berbaloi pulak. jadi at last kami decide beli cheese cake tapi tulis je birthday gitu. sekali ngan kotak, dalam rm16 gitu la, takde la besar pun, dalam 500g kot. tak pastilah.
lepas beli, yang boleh solat pergi solat asar, yang ABC, jalan-jalan je. Lepas tu, kami meronda dalam Aeon tu cari hadiah untuk program makan2 dengan mentor rabu ni. Naik floor atas tengok ada kedai baru bukak, Yubiso. Ingat nak beli situ, tapi macam tak banyak sangat. So, terus ke Daiso. Beli barang kat situ. Sambil tu jenguk GSC tengok movie Shin Chan main lagi tak, tapi nampak macam tak ada je, jadi kami teruskan berjalan. Masuk brand outlet dengan Padini, hmm.. promosi macam biasa je. so cuci mata jela. bukan keperluan pun, kan. masuk Popular, hmmm.. tergugatla jugak iman nak beli buku, tapi bila kenangkan elaun dan buku-buku yang masih tak habis baca, kita sabarkan lah hati tu ye.
Then, outing hari tu habis dengan beli kat aeon bawah tu je, beli buah dan makanan sikit sebelum balik. Hahahaha... a day worth for new experience and story have ended. so, i would say this is a nice day to be enjoyed when we are a student despite all of everything that happened.
Okey, kembali ke dunia belajar semula. Bye.
Sekarang nak cerita pasal outing semalam kat Aeon Bandaraya Melaka. Sebenarnya biasa je outing sini tapi sebab ada event2 tertentu, rasa nak cerita pulak. Kebetulan sehari sebelumnya (Jumaat) is my roomate birthday. So, ingatkan nak outing hari Jumaat beli kek ke apa untuk beliau. *hahhaha*.. tapi sebabnya si pengajaknya rasa agak letih dan malas *including me*, kami tangguh ke esoknya. Jadi esoknya ingatkan nak ajak birthday girl (Anis) keluar sekali lepas habis program kelab dia, tapi kami (Aiza, K.Sirah, K.Mirah & Fadh) tak cakap la nak sambut birthday, cakap nak keluar makan je, tapi beliau taknak sebab dah makan masa kat program dan siap ada bekal lunch lagi, so taknak keluar, jadi kami berlima ni jelah keluar, kira balik bawak kek je lah kan. Then, lepas Zohor je kami bersiap keluar. Mula-mula ingat nak pergi Tesco je, tapi entah macam mana, secara ad hoc, terus turun kat Aeon. hahahah
Sampai je kat Aeon, tengok ramai jugak orang sebab ada banyak promosi kat Aeon. Hahahahha.. sekarang kan hujung bulan, jadi banyak promosi. Tapi kami teruskan je cari tempat nak makan, tapi on the way pilih tempat nak makan, kami nampak macam ada pameran je kat dalam tengah Aeon tu, rupanya ada mini exhibition yang bertajuk The Best Of You. Jadi, kami masuklah, tengok-tengok. Nasib baik free je semua ni. Pameran ni pasal pengalaman atau perkongsian tentang pengunjung pameran ni atau siapa2 je yang berkongsikan cerita atau life view about something that came within themself. Macam sesuatu yang boleh menginspirasikan diri sendiri dan orang lain. It's a good thing that come from good people.
Dan, pihak pameran juga kutip perkongsian tu dari pengunjung yang datang ke pameran ni. Mereka bagi poskad untuk kita tulis apa yang kita nak kongsikan dan ambil gambar untuk dilekatkan kat poskad tu. Jadi kami tak lepaskan peluang untuk buat ucapan birthday for our friend dan lekatkan kat sini. Tapi kami ambil dua poskad, satu untuk birthday, satu untuk friendship *hmm... ye kot macam ni*. Lepas tulis tu, pihak pameran ambil gambar kami dan print dan bagi satu salinan untuk kami. Poskad tu kemudian kami gantung kat situ. Semua ni percuma saja. Memang pengalaman yang sangat menarik sebab kita boleh baca pengalaman dan perkongsian orang lain yang sangat orang kata give a good vibes and help us to view this world better by knowing everyone have their own hardship and this world is full of something that we don't know yet something nice are there for us to explore. It leaves me with very good impression.
Lepas tengok pameran situ, kami pun mula cari tempat nak makan. Baru sedar yang perut dah sangat lapar. Mula-mula ingat nak makan kat KFC sebab biasanya nasi dia agak mengenyangkan, tapi lepas lalu depan Sukiya rasa macam nak try sebab sebelum ni rasa tak berani, tapi sebab rasa macam nak explore something new, masukla jugak walaupun risau takut tak sedap and takut tak padan dengan harga. Tapi harga dia standard je, boleh tahan. Aku, Aiza ngan K.Sirah pun masuklah nak cuba. Lama jugak dok tilik menu, dalam 15 minit gitu, sebab konfius sangat nak pilih menu, takut tak sedap lah, itulah, inilah Orang lain dah siap makan baru kami siap pilih. Hahahaha... Lastly, aku pilih set gyudon and curry. Aiza pilih spicy gyudon apa ntah dengan ice lemon tea. K.Sirah pun pilih yang spicy gyudon tambah karaage dengan ice lemon tea. Aku pulak pilih set gyudon dengan curry with iced green tea. Dua2 nasi. tak sedar pun. Lepas order baru trnampak, spatutnya pilih ramen dengan curry, je. Tapi tak apa lah.
 |
| my set (curry, gyudon, miso soup, kimchi-dish-like, & iced green tea) = rm15.90 |
Lepas tu, kami pun start cari kek. Mula-mula ingat nak beli kek birthday, tapi bila tengok harga dan jenis dia, macam hmmmm... tak berbaloi pulak. jadi at last kami decide beli cheese cake tapi tulis je birthday gitu. sekali ngan kotak, dalam rm16 gitu la, takde la besar pun, dalam 500g kot. tak pastilah.
Then, outing hari tu habis dengan beli kat aeon bawah tu je, beli buah dan makanan sikit sebelum balik. Hahahaha... a day worth for new experience and story have ended. so, i would say this is a nice day to be enjoyed when we are a student despite all of everything that happened.
Okey, kembali ke dunia belajar semula. Bye.
Sunday, October 09, 2016
A Me Who Got Various of Interest... and Distractions
Assalamualaikum.
Another posting from me. Hahaha... Lately, I've been into dramas very much since my assignment hampir habis and get ready to exam actually. But, since I got this opportunity very rarely, masa dihabiskan dengan layan movie and drama. Tapi, kebanyakan drama banyak buat aku berfikir although sometimes it is not related with anything and booomm... i came to a new philosophy. Maybe thats how introvert person viewing things. I'm good with analogy anyway. And to my conscious, I have changed a little, in a good sense maybe. Like I'm not to pious like before. Hahah.. not that I'm that alim, but now I became more daring or like to step a little on barrier. macam melanggar peraturan? no, macam tak terlalu mengikut peraturan. I rather be casual and flexible. like things can be adjust ma.
Those perenggan kat atas actually define me very well, like how I can jump to a new topic very fast. This way, people always have a hard time to understand me. Cause I'm easy to be distracted. muncul topik baru, and I forget the old one. this kind of sikap make me bored easily and also easily excited. cepat panas and cepat sejuk. i got to many of interest and then i forget the old one. peribahasa melayu kata, "hangat-hangat tahi ayam". contohnya, minat menjahit. then i will be sewing in every my leisure time like make a sling bag, purse, sarung bantal and so on, and after a while, i lost interest in it. then, another minat come out. but then, my old interest will come around again and for a meant time, i will be devoted to it until another interest caught me again. it had been that way for a long time. that's how I am, unfortunately. hope my relationship with people will be longlasting at least.
oh, my thing about melanggar sedikit peraturan, contohnya waktu curfew weekdays sampai pukul 7, then i dont mind getting back at 8 or 9. though there's a little penalty but i dare to break the rules coz i've got a little kepercayaan or keyakinan ke atas sesuatu like i've gone many things that went badly so this will not be any different. and, "bukan selalu buat macam ni."- like. haha, there's this thrilled feeling that excites me. like going into an adventures. for an introvert like me, this is very arousing.
oh, another point in this posting title. i've been watching korean drama which were before this i'm kind of anti with korean thing, but then, i try to watch them to challenge myself, like "hmmm, sebelum ni ngkau anti sangat ngan korea kan, nah try tengok dulu, takut nanti tersuka pulak..."hhahaha.. this kind of monologue always occur in myself like another me also exist which always challenge me to do something new or debating with me over some issues. then, i watched sampai beberapa drama. and my thought was, "hmm.. not bad." because i could understand how people think or why people act in any way along with the culture. watching drama actually just like reading a book, you want to know how things happen or the new information or learn about people. that's how drama are to me. it helps me psychologically. same goes to japan drama. the reason why i love it a lot because they create something that we never think could happen, or they show things that i'm always thinking. how they show their principles or how things should be done correctly (in their way of course) and how their world revolve. i just like that.
the me, (haha) also keep distracted with people around me. they really made me or molding me? like who i am are who am i spending time with. although i have my own core that cannot be change by anyone. i'm on an act with them. but i dont find that awkward because that how society are. we change our attitude based on who we deal with. not everyone receive the same layanan from us. or not in front of everyone we act the same. this is not arrogant words, just stating things that we are doing.
me who keeps talking random will stop talking for now. bye.
Another posting from me. Hahaha... Lately, I've been into dramas very much since my assignment hampir habis and get ready to exam actually. But, since I got this opportunity very rarely, masa dihabiskan dengan layan movie and drama. Tapi, kebanyakan drama banyak buat aku berfikir although sometimes it is not related with anything and booomm... i came to a new philosophy. Maybe thats how introvert person viewing things. I'm good with analogy anyway. And to my conscious, I have changed a little, in a good sense maybe. Like I'm not to pious like before. Hahah.. not that I'm that alim, but now I became more daring or like to step a little on barrier. macam melanggar peraturan? no, macam tak terlalu mengikut peraturan. I rather be casual and flexible. like things can be adjust ma.
Those perenggan kat atas actually define me very well, like how I can jump to a new topic very fast. This way, people always have a hard time to understand me. Cause I'm easy to be distracted. muncul topik baru, and I forget the old one. this kind of sikap make me bored easily and also easily excited. cepat panas and cepat sejuk. i got to many of interest and then i forget the old one. peribahasa melayu kata, "hangat-hangat tahi ayam". contohnya, minat menjahit. then i will be sewing in every my leisure time like make a sling bag, purse, sarung bantal and so on, and after a while, i lost interest in it. then, another minat come out. but then, my old interest will come around again and for a meant time, i will be devoted to it until another interest caught me again. it had been that way for a long time. that's how I am, unfortunately. hope my relationship with people will be longlasting at least.
oh, my thing about melanggar sedikit peraturan, contohnya waktu curfew weekdays sampai pukul 7, then i dont mind getting back at 8 or 9. though there's a little penalty but i dare to break the rules coz i've got a little kepercayaan or keyakinan ke atas sesuatu like i've gone many things that went badly so this will not be any different. and, "bukan selalu buat macam ni."- like. haha, there's this thrilled feeling that excites me. like going into an adventures. for an introvert like me, this is very arousing.
oh, another point in this posting title. i've been watching korean drama which were before this i'm kind of anti with korean thing, but then, i try to watch them to challenge myself, like "hmmm, sebelum ni ngkau anti sangat ngan korea kan, nah try tengok dulu, takut nanti tersuka pulak..."hhahaha.. this kind of monologue always occur in myself like another me also exist which always challenge me to do something new or debating with me over some issues. then, i watched sampai beberapa drama. and my thought was, "hmm.. not bad." because i could understand how people think or why people act in any way along with the culture. watching drama actually just like reading a book, you want to know how things happen or the new information or learn about people. that's how drama are to me. it helps me psychologically. same goes to japan drama. the reason why i love it a lot because they create something that we never think could happen, or they show things that i'm always thinking. how they show their principles or how things should be done correctly (in their way of course) and how their world revolve. i just like that.
the me, (haha) also keep distracted with people around me. they really made me or molding me? like who i am are who am i spending time with. although i have my own core that cannot be change by anyone. i'm on an act with them. but i dont find that awkward because that how society are. we change our attitude based on who we deal with. not everyone receive the same layanan from us. or not in front of everyone we act the same. this is not arrogant words, just stating things that we are doing.
me who keeps talking random will stop talking for now. bye.
Friday, August 26, 2016
Sakit Gigi Lagi
Assalamualaikum blog~ Hai..
Hari ni pergi klinik gigi lagi. Buat tampalan semula gigi sebab hari Isnin lepas dah pergi. Masa pergi hari Isnin tu, saja nak tampal gigi yang dah lama berlubang. Pergi hari Isnin sebab hari tu IPG buat program, dah la sepanjang hari , jadi tak ada kuliah. Fikir-fikir daripada duduk je dalam program tu, baik pergi cek gigi, lagipun gigi tu dah lama berlubang. Makan pun selama ni macam tak selesa. Jadi macam orang tua. Selalu hisap celah gigi sebab makanan terlekat. Jadi hari Isnin tu pergilah dekat Klinik Pergigian Peringgit kat Melaka ni.
Sampai je kat sana, tengok macam tak ramai orang , jauh beza kat bawah (tingkat bawah tu klinik untuk sakit ringan/umum). Nasib baik jugak, jadi tak payah tunggu lama. Kejap je, lepas daftar tunggu dalam 3 ke 4 minit gitu, terus nombor kena panggil. Sebelum masuk tu memang selawat Bismillah banyak-banyak, mintak2 doktor perempuan yang baik-baik, tak garang. Alhamdulillah dapat doktor perempuan, muka comel je cakap lemah lembut. Lega sikit rasa. Lepas tu dia tanya nak buat apa. Pastu cakaplah nak tampal gigi. Dia pun macam biasa lah suruh baring nak tengok. Bila dia tengok apa semua tu, dia cakap lubang yang nak ditampal tu agak besar dan dalam. Tapi, doktor tu kata dia try tampal je dulu. Aku pun setuju je lah. Masa dia tampal tu, Ya Allah macam biasa, aku memang ngilu bila dengar mesin dia tu. Hahaha.. tapi tahan jela.. Tapi, masa dia masukkan sesuatu macam besi antara gigi/gusi tu, sakit ngilu sangat.. Aku ingatkan sebab proses nak tampal, so biarkan jelah. Lepas habis rawatan tu, dia kata sebenarnya banyak lagi rawatan yang aku kena buat sebab ada 2 lagi gigi yang berlubang dan perlu cuci karang gigi lagi. Tapi disebabkan situ klinik kerajaan, so polisinya satu kali rawatan untuk sekali datang. Jadi, kalau nak buat rawatan lain kena datang lagi lah.. tapi mungkin jugak kena ambil nombor lain (mungkin sebab takut pesakit lain menunggu, sebab aku ada dengar dia tanya nurse, ada lagi ke pesakit, pastu nurse kata ada sorang lagi menunggu), mungkin gitu kot, tapi tak pastilah. Jadi Isnin tu aku pun baliklah IPG dengan rasa sakit tu (yela... ingatkan sakit kejap je).
Lepas tu sepanjang hari Isnin sampai Jumaat (sebelum pergi klinik), gigi yang doktor tampal tu sakit je (selalu berdenyut-denyut) sampai muka aku memang ada orang tegur selalu berkerut-kerut walaupun tak naik ke kepala lagi. Tapi sakit dia on off la, kejap sakit kejap tak..Tapi kalau time sakit memang aku ni duk pegang pipi je lah. Tekan-tekan gitu. Aku ada search kat Internet, pasal sakit gigi lepas tampalan dan ada la jumpa kat blog Indon, katanya mungkin bawah tampalan tu masih ada bakteria yang tak dibersihkan dengan baik atau tampalan tu mengenai saraf gigi. Sebab tu jadi sakit lepas tampalan. Akhirnya tengah hari tadi aku decide nak pegi klinik jugak alang-alang waktu tu free kejap. Yelah.. dah lama aku beralasan tak de masa nak pergi klinik sebabkan assignment, aktiviti dan macam2 lagi kegiatan kat IPG ni. So, tadi aku pun pergi lah, ajak dua tiga orang kawan yang selalu jugak pesan kat aku, kalau nak pergi klinik gigi ajak diorang. Tapi, hmm.. salah timing kot, semua yang diajak tu taknak pulak pergi.. ada kerja lah kan. Cuma kawan aku sorang ni je tawarkan diri nak teman, tapi disebabkan dia kena jumpa lecturer petang ni, so dia ajak aku pergi dalam pukul 3.30 gitu. Aku pun setujulah sebelum dapat whatsapp dari sorang ni pulak, kata nak pergi bank, tapi dia ajak pergi sekali jelah. Waktu tu dah pukul 2 lebih, so aku setuju lah sebab boleh pergi awal sikit. Yang tawarkan diri tadi tu aku bagitau je la yang tak jadi pergi dengan dia. Jadi kitorang pun pegilah (walaupun kawan aku tu pergi bank, aku pegi klinik sorang).
Sampai je kat klinik tu, aku tengok, wow lengangnya..memang tak sibuk langsung ada dalam 5, 6 orang je kat bawah tu. Jauh beza macam yang aku pegi hari Isnin hari tu, padahal waktu lebih kurang je. Jadi, aku terus menapak ke tingkat atas, bahagian klinik pergigian. Bila bukak je pintu tu, aku perasan kenapa gelap je walaupun adalah dua tiga orang duk menunggu kat tempat duduk tu..Tapi ada je nurse yang jaga kaunter tu. Ingatkan nak jimat letrik, rupanya waktu beroperasi hari Jumaat memang start pukul 2.30. Hahaha... Tu yang bila aku letak je I/C kat kaunter tu dia suruh tunggu dulu. Nak tunggu doktor masuk dulu. Lepas tu, dalam pukul 2.50 gitu, barulah dapat nombor (lepas nurse tu dah panggil nama semua).
Tunggu dalam 10 minit gitu, nombor dah kena seru. Masuk je bilik nombor 4 tu, nampak doktor yang sama hari tu. Memang dah diassign kot sebab bila kita nak daftar kan, nurse tanya, pernah datang tak, kalau pernah bila kali terakhir. Tu yang bila aku kata kat nurse tu datang Isnin lepas terus dia masuk ke bilik doktor (cek rekod aku kot, dengan doktor mana).
Okay, berbalik bila masuk bilik doktor tu semula, doktor tanya sakit apa. Pastu aku pun jelaskan la sakit gini2. Dia pun cek kejap dan bagitau mungkin aku punya tampalan tu tak berkesan pada gigi yang dah berlubang besar dan dalam. So, untuk pastikan dia suruh aku x-ray dulu gigi tu. Untuk tu, pembantu doktor (nurse kot orang panggil) suruh aku ikut dia ke bilik x-ray. Dia masukkan plak yang kecik tu je dalam mulut. Sakit jugaklah sebab kena letak bawah lidah, dahla dalam keadaan melintang. Tapi kejap je. Pembantu doktor ni pun baik je, lembut. Mesin x ray tu macam kat bawah ni.
takde lah rumit sangat, lebih kurang macam gambar kat atas. Lepas tu, filem gigi aku tu dia bawak kepada doktor dan doktor bagitau aku memang lubang aku ni dalam sangat dan hampir sampai ke saraf gigi. So dia kata dia akan cabut balik tampalan tu dan akan letak ubat dan tampal balik. If its work, then I'm safe but if I got any complication then it's time for those two option. Yup, RCT or cabut gigi !! RCT tu root canal treatment atau rawatan akar. Aku sebenarnya dah kali ketiga ditawarkan rawatan akar ni. First, masa tingkatan 3 untuk gigi belah kanan. Hahaha. berlubang teruk. Masa tu ingatkan nak buat RCT, tapi lastly doktor tu kata macam dah tak boleh buat. Jadi, panggil penjaga (ayah aku) dan bincang untuk cabut. Hahaha.. sedih je.. muda-muda dah kena cabut gigi kekal tu. Then, second was my first year at IPG. Masa tu, blur sikit pasal penerangan doktor tu. Dia kata RCT ni risiko besar..bla.. bla..(dekat Klinik Peringgit ni jugak, tapi doktor lain), then she suggested me to do tooth extraction. ahhaha.. CABUT GIGI!!.. jadinya, disebabkan sakit gigi aku masa tu melampau-lampau sakitnya sampaikan nak tidur pun tak boleh. Jadi, aku buat keputusan untuk cabut je (masa ni dah cukup umur, tak perlu kebenaran penjaga).
Then, just now I was offered again with the two options, IF the filling wasn't working on my third risky tooth. Hahaha..jadi, seperti yang diberitahu, doktor tu pun start dengan cabut balik tampalan yang sebelumnya dan cuci (cuci kot) sebelum bubuh ubat. Masa doktor tu nak cabut tampalan, kan guna mesin tu,,, YA ALLAH ngilunya hanya Tuhan yang tahu.. Keras badan aku duduk atas kerusi tu. Tapi.. hm... mampu tahan jela.. sape suruh tak jaga gigi baik-baik kan.. Lepas doktor cabut tampalan tu, dia pun sapu ubat tu.. rasa dia macam bunga cengkih + mint gitu. berangin. lepas je dia cabut tampalan and bubuh ubat tu, terus hilang sakit gigi. hahaa.. rasa dah okay kut. Dalam hati, "tak perlu dah kot RCT tu" .. tapi kena jagalah kann gigi ni.
Dan, sekarang aku rasa tampalan ni lagi okey dari yang sebelumnya. Lepas tu doktor tu kata, dalam 2-4 minggu lagi, kena datang balik untuk cek sama ada tampalan ni okey tak atau kena proceed dengan RCT. Hmm.. aku pulak, ikutlah mana-mana, asalkan tak kena cabut lagi.. Huwaa.. takmaula.. umur tak sampai dua puluh dah tiga batang gigi kekal nak kena cabut. Dua tak ada ni pun dah rasa macam makcik umor empat puluh dah.. tapi, dalam beberapa minggu/bulan ni mungkin aku akan pergi lagi kut untuk tampal gigi lain dan cuci karang gigi. Banyak betul sebenarnya rawatan gigi yang aku kena buat lagi ni. Tapi, rawatan kali ni dengan doktor ni aku paling suka sebab doktor baik dan lemah lembut. Tak ada nak garang atau marah-marah. Ye la..biasanya doktor kerajaan ni suka marah-marah gak.. Sebab stress kot, kan biasanya ramai pesakit jadi kesabaran tu tercabar la jugak. Doktor gigi kat klinik Peringgit ni tak ada lah nampak pemarahnya sebab aku perasan jugak yang pesakit kat sini tak adalah ramai sangat. Cuma kat bahagian bawah (klinik untuk pesakit biasa/luar) tu je yang ramai beghiokk (orang klate kata). Doktor kat bahagian bawah tu pun garang-garang.. Hahaha.. aku pernah kena, tiba-tiba kena marah dan halau duduk luar sebab teman kawan aku masuk. Hm.. mungkin serabut kut ramai sangat orang masa tu. Hahaha.. tapi waktu lain aku sebagai pesakit pun kena marah sebab lewat pegi klinik. Penyakit dah berat baru nak pergi klinik. Yang marah tu aku tak kisah, tapi dia macam hina aku sebab masa tu aku berkudis kat tangan. Boleh pulak dia kata, "Euww.. geli aku tengok kau ni.", "Jangan tersentuh, nanti aku pulak berjangkit". Hmm.. tersentuh hati jugaklah bila kena kata gitu, macam hinanya aku ni...Tapi tak apalah.. mungkin dia tengah stress kot.
Hahaha.. okey.. dah habis cerita gigi.. sampai melarat ke cerita doktor pulak.. Haha..kbye.
Hari ni pergi klinik gigi lagi. Buat tampalan semula gigi sebab hari Isnin lepas dah pergi. Masa pergi hari Isnin tu, saja nak tampal gigi yang dah lama berlubang. Pergi hari Isnin sebab hari tu IPG buat program, dah la sepanjang hari , jadi tak ada kuliah. Fikir-fikir daripada duduk je dalam program tu, baik pergi cek gigi, lagipun gigi tu dah lama berlubang. Makan pun selama ni macam tak selesa. Jadi macam orang tua. Selalu hisap celah gigi sebab makanan terlekat. Jadi hari Isnin tu pergilah dekat Klinik Pergigian Peringgit kat Melaka ni.
Sampai je kat sana, tengok macam tak ramai orang , jauh beza kat bawah (tingkat bawah tu klinik untuk sakit ringan/umum). Nasib baik jugak, jadi tak payah tunggu lama. Kejap je, lepas daftar tunggu dalam 3 ke 4 minit gitu, terus nombor kena panggil. Sebelum masuk tu memang selawat Bismillah banyak-banyak, mintak2 doktor perempuan yang baik-baik, tak garang. Alhamdulillah dapat doktor perempuan, muka comel je cakap lemah lembut. Lega sikit rasa. Lepas tu dia tanya nak buat apa. Pastu cakaplah nak tampal gigi. Dia pun macam biasa lah suruh baring nak tengok. Bila dia tengok apa semua tu, dia cakap lubang yang nak ditampal tu agak besar dan dalam. Tapi, doktor tu kata dia try tampal je dulu. Aku pun setuju je lah. Masa dia tampal tu, Ya Allah macam biasa, aku memang ngilu bila dengar mesin dia tu. Hahaha.. tapi tahan jela.. Tapi, masa dia masukkan sesuatu macam besi antara gigi/gusi tu, sakit ngilu sangat.. Aku ingatkan sebab proses nak tampal, so biarkan jelah. Lepas habis rawatan tu, dia kata sebenarnya banyak lagi rawatan yang aku kena buat sebab ada 2 lagi gigi yang berlubang dan perlu cuci karang gigi lagi. Tapi disebabkan situ klinik kerajaan, so polisinya satu kali rawatan untuk sekali datang. Jadi, kalau nak buat rawatan lain kena datang lagi lah.. tapi mungkin jugak kena ambil nombor lain (mungkin sebab takut pesakit lain menunggu, sebab aku ada dengar dia tanya nurse, ada lagi ke pesakit, pastu nurse kata ada sorang lagi menunggu), mungkin gitu kot, tapi tak pastilah. Jadi Isnin tu aku pun baliklah IPG dengan rasa sakit tu (yela... ingatkan sakit kejap je).
Lepas tu sepanjang hari Isnin sampai Jumaat (sebelum pergi klinik), gigi yang doktor tampal tu sakit je (selalu berdenyut-denyut) sampai muka aku memang ada orang tegur selalu berkerut-kerut walaupun tak naik ke kepala lagi. Tapi sakit dia on off la, kejap sakit kejap tak..Tapi kalau time sakit memang aku ni duk pegang pipi je lah. Tekan-tekan gitu. Aku ada search kat Internet, pasal sakit gigi lepas tampalan dan ada la jumpa kat blog Indon, katanya mungkin bawah tampalan tu masih ada bakteria yang tak dibersihkan dengan baik atau tampalan tu mengenai saraf gigi. Sebab tu jadi sakit lepas tampalan. Akhirnya tengah hari tadi aku decide nak pegi klinik jugak alang-alang waktu tu free kejap. Yelah.. dah lama aku beralasan tak de masa nak pergi klinik sebabkan assignment, aktiviti dan macam2 lagi kegiatan kat IPG ni. So, tadi aku pun pergi lah, ajak dua tiga orang kawan yang selalu jugak pesan kat aku, kalau nak pergi klinik gigi ajak diorang. Tapi, hmm.. salah timing kot, semua yang diajak tu taknak pulak pergi.. ada kerja lah kan. Cuma kawan aku sorang ni je tawarkan diri nak teman, tapi disebabkan dia kena jumpa lecturer petang ni, so dia ajak aku pergi dalam pukul 3.30 gitu. Aku pun setujulah sebelum dapat whatsapp dari sorang ni pulak, kata nak pergi bank, tapi dia ajak pergi sekali jelah. Waktu tu dah pukul 2 lebih, so aku setuju lah sebab boleh pergi awal sikit. Yang tawarkan diri tadi tu aku bagitau je la yang tak jadi pergi dengan dia. Jadi kitorang pun pegilah (walaupun kawan aku tu pergi bank, aku pegi klinik sorang).
Sampai je kat klinik tu, aku tengok, wow lengangnya..memang tak sibuk langsung ada dalam 5, 6 orang je kat bawah tu. Jauh beza macam yang aku pegi hari Isnin hari tu, padahal waktu lebih kurang je. Jadi, aku terus menapak ke tingkat atas, bahagian klinik pergigian. Bila bukak je pintu tu, aku perasan kenapa gelap je walaupun adalah dua tiga orang duk menunggu kat tempat duduk tu..Tapi ada je nurse yang jaga kaunter tu. Ingatkan nak jimat letrik, rupanya waktu beroperasi hari Jumaat memang start pukul 2.30. Hahaha... Tu yang bila aku letak je I/C kat kaunter tu dia suruh tunggu dulu. Nak tunggu doktor masuk dulu. Lepas tu, dalam pukul 2.50 gitu, barulah dapat nombor (lepas nurse tu dah panggil nama semua).
Okay, berbalik bila masuk bilik doktor tu semula, doktor tanya sakit apa. Pastu aku pun jelaskan la sakit gini2. Dia pun cek kejap dan bagitau mungkin aku punya tampalan tu tak berkesan pada gigi yang dah berlubang besar dan dalam. So, untuk pastikan dia suruh aku x-ray dulu gigi tu. Untuk tu, pembantu doktor (nurse kot orang panggil) suruh aku ikut dia ke bilik x-ray. Dia masukkan plak yang kecik tu je dalam mulut. Sakit jugaklah sebab kena letak bawah lidah, dahla dalam keadaan melintang. Tapi kejap je. Pembantu doktor ni pun baik je, lembut. Mesin x ray tu macam kat bawah ni.
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| credit to google |
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| credit to google |
Then, just now I was offered again with the two options, IF the filling wasn't working on my third risky tooth. Hahaha..jadi, seperti yang diberitahu, doktor tu pun start dengan cabut balik tampalan yang sebelumnya dan cuci (cuci kot) sebelum bubuh ubat. Masa doktor tu nak cabut tampalan, kan guna mesin tu,,, YA ALLAH ngilunya hanya Tuhan yang tahu.. Keras badan aku duduk atas kerusi tu. Tapi.. hm... mampu tahan jela.. sape suruh tak jaga gigi baik-baik kan.. Lepas doktor cabut tampalan tu, dia pun sapu ubat tu.. rasa dia macam bunga cengkih + mint gitu. berangin. lepas je dia cabut tampalan and bubuh ubat tu, terus hilang sakit gigi. hahaa.. rasa dah okay kut. Dalam hati, "tak perlu dah kot RCT tu" .. tapi kena jagalah kann gigi ni.
Dan, sekarang aku rasa tampalan ni lagi okey dari yang sebelumnya. Lepas tu doktor tu kata, dalam 2-4 minggu lagi, kena datang balik untuk cek sama ada tampalan ni okey tak atau kena proceed dengan RCT. Hmm.. aku pulak, ikutlah mana-mana, asalkan tak kena cabut lagi.. Huwaa.. takmaula.. umur tak sampai dua puluh dah tiga batang gigi kekal nak kena cabut. Dua tak ada ni pun dah rasa macam makcik umor empat puluh dah.. tapi, dalam beberapa minggu/bulan ni mungkin aku akan pergi lagi kut untuk tampal gigi lain dan cuci karang gigi. Banyak betul sebenarnya rawatan gigi yang aku kena buat lagi ni. Tapi, rawatan kali ni dengan doktor ni aku paling suka sebab doktor baik dan lemah lembut. Tak ada nak garang atau marah-marah. Ye la..biasanya doktor kerajaan ni suka marah-marah gak.. Sebab stress kot, kan biasanya ramai pesakit jadi kesabaran tu tercabar la jugak. Doktor gigi kat klinik Peringgit ni tak ada lah nampak pemarahnya sebab aku perasan jugak yang pesakit kat sini tak adalah ramai sangat. Cuma kat bahagian bawah (klinik untuk pesakit biasa/luar) tu je yang ramai beghiokk (orang klate kata). Doktor kat bahagian bawah tu pun garang-garang.. Hahaha.. aku pernah kena, tiba-tiba kena marah dan halau duduk luar sebab teman kawan aku masuk. Hm.. mungkin serabut kut ramai sangat orang masa tu. Hahaha.. tapi waktu lain aku sebagai pesakit pun kena marah sebab lewat pegi klinik. Penyakit dah berat baru nak pergi klinik. Yang marah tu aku tak kisah, tapi dia macam hina aku sebab masa tu aku berkudis kat tangan. Boleh pulak dia kata, "Euww.. geli aku tengok kau ni.", "Jangan tersentuh, nanti aku pulak berjangkit". Hmm.. tersentuh hati jugaklah bila kena kata gitu, macam hinanya aku ni...Tapi tak apalah.. mungkin dia tengah stress kot.
Hahaha.. okey.. dah habis cerita gigi.. sampai melarat ke cerita doktor pulak.. Haha..kbye.
Wednesday, May 04, 2016
Mungkin makin tua
Assalamualaikum. Haii...
setelah sekian lama mendiamkan diri. Ops, bukan mendiamkan diri, terpaksa mendiamkan diri, eh... walaupun sebenarnya mungkin ada saja masa, cuma kemalasan itu sentiasa melanda. Hohoho
Sekarang ni, aku dah semester dua, tahun satu. Hurmm... nampak macam masih jauh perjalanan untuk sampai ke tahun empat. Tapi, pejam celik, pejam celik sebenarnya kejap saja. Sepanjang aku hidup sebagai anak rantauan ni, banyak sangat pengalaman dan ilmu yang aku dapat. Hmm.. dah macam karangan refleksi pulak.
Tapi, sebetulnya begitulah. Aku faham karenah manusia, *termasuk diri sendiri*, faham bagaimana sosial masyarakat itu terdiri, mungkin juga faham bagaimana suatu sistem itu terjadi. Semua ni membuatkan mata dan minda aku lebih terbuka luas dan lebar sehingga kadang-kadang aku juga hanyut di dalam ruang yang luas itu. Namun, hidup di perantauan dari luarnya nampak tiada apa yang besar, tapi perasaan dan emosi adalah bahagian manusia yang sangat terkesan. Rindu hingga hati sakit jadinya, pedih hingga mengalirkan air mata. Angan-angan untuk berpindah dekat dengan keluarga sentiasa melekat di jiwa dan kepala.
Belum lagi dengan karenah manusia sekeliling, kesesuaian jiwa yang perlu di suaikan dengan mereka hatta rakan sebilik, rakan sekelas mahupun sesiapa sahaja. Waktu ini, aku perlu cekal, perlu bijak mengawal diri. Waktu ini juga, nasihat walid dan umi adalah valid dan solid untuk digunakan. Mungkin aku sedang dewasa, namun sifat keanak-anakan juga yang kubawa.
Beban fikiran, menanggung masa depan sendiri, masa depan adikku, masa depan abang-abangku, masa depan kakakku, dan yang paling penting bagaimana masa depan ibu bapaku bersama anak-anaknya semua. Sentiasa aku letih dan lemah melayan hawa sendiri. Walaupun tidaklah seberat orang lain, namun fikiran dan jiwaku hanya cukup untuk diri ini sahaja.
Namun, sering aku risau. Pening memikirkan semua, meletakkan semua di atas satu. Hingga kadang-kadang tercicir apa yang perlu.
Aku mahu kuat, mahu tekad. Tapi, usahaku belum cekap.
Setakat itu sahaja luahan yang terluah :) .
Hmm.. Bye
setelah sekian lama mendiamkan diri. Ops, bukan mendiamkan diri, terpaksa mendiamkan diri, eh... walaupun sebenarnya mungkin ada saja masa, cuma kemalasan itu sentiasa melanda. Hohoho
Sekarang ni, aku dah semester dua, tahun satu. Hurmm... nampak macam masih jauh perjalanan untuk sampai ke tahun empat. Tapi, pejam celik, pejam celik sebenarnya kejap saja. Sepanjang aku hidup sebagai anak rantauan ni, banyak sangat pengalaman dan ilmu yang aku dapat. Hmm.. dah macam karangan refleksi pulak.
Tapi, sebetulnya begitulah. Aku faham karenah manusia, *termasuk diri sendiri*, faham bagaimana sosial masyarakat itu terdiri, mungkin juga faham bagaimana suatu sistem itu terjadi. Semua ni membuatkan mata dan minda aku lebih terbuka luas dan lebar sehingga kadang-kadang aku juga hanyut di dalam ruang yang luas itu. Namun, hidup di perantauan dari luarnya nampak tiada apa yang besar, tapi perasaan dan emosi adalah bahagian manusia yang sangat terkesan. Rindu hingga hati sakit jadinya, pedih hingga mengalirkan air mata. Angan-angan untuk berpindah dekat dengan keluarga sentiasa melekat di jiwa dan kepala.Belum lagi dengan karenah manusia sekeliling, kesesuaian jiwa yang perlu di suaikan dengan mereka hatta rakan sebilik, rakan sekelas mahupun sesiapa sahaja. Waktu ini, aku perlu cekal, perlu bijak mengawal diri. Waktu ini juga, nasihat walid dan umi adalah valid dan solid untuk digunakan. Mungkin aku sedang dewasa, namun sifat keanak-anakan juga yang kubawa.
Beban fikiran, menanggung masa depan sendiri, masa depan adikku, masa depan abang-abangku, masa depan kakakku, dan yang paling penting bagaimana masa depan ibu bapaku bersama anak-anaknya semua. Sentiasa aku letih dan lemah melayan hawa sendiri. Walaupun tidaklah seberat orang lain, namun fikiran dan jiwaku hanya cukup untuk diri ini sahaja.
Namun, sering aku risau. Pening memikirkan semua, meletakkan semua di atas satu. Hingga kadang-kadang tercicir apa yang perlu.
Aku mahu kuat, mahu tekad. Tapi, usahaku belum cekap.
Setakat itu sahaja luahan yang terluah :) .
Hmm.. Bye
Monday, September 28, 2015
Butterflies in My Stomach
Hi. Here I appear again. How are you today? Hehe
Ya know, yesterday, my heart had goes too many of 'doki-doki' and kind of bursting because yesterday, too many things happen. All the occasions make my heart jump too many times and my head was all unorganized because all of the things that happen were kind of unexpected and too rushing.
Fisrtly, I had my English classes and we'd done many activies and all of them were so fun that I'm become excited all over. Then, before I could realize, I had to do my presentation for my Special Ed subject (cause the mark will be added to my coursework) so I had this butterflies in my stomach, anxiously, ya know with my hands and feet went freezing and my heart pounds loudly which make me unable to calm myself. I felt that time like my heart almost burst and I'm afraid that I'll act uncontrollable...hhehe
Fortunately I was able to finish it smoothly (I think). My lecturer however won't tell us (since I do it with my partner) our mark (because for previous partners, he would told them). I hope it's all okay (since it will affect my pointer). Hahahha.. so I do care about my pointer.
Then, when I get to know from the PA of other subject (related to Special Ed too), that the lecturer want us to present our pet this Thursday, we all became so nervous and start to fussing around on a planning to buy our pet since many of us still don't have our own pet to get presented.
Then, while I'm waiting at the cafeteria for my other friends to go buying fish (as we decided to pet fish, since it's the most easy pet to take care of, at least until the day of presentation. XD), I had received an email on my application for a monitor tour to Chiba prefecture. It said that I was able to proceed to the next level which is the interview. Woahhhh....
I'm so happy that I could hug anyone (my only mahram, of course).... Although it is just an interview, too me it is the big accomplishment for myself since I did not accomplish anything in the past semester (I mean something meaningful like this, heee *too me, it's so meaningful, kayhh).
When, all of things didn't settle yet in my mind (I couldn't replied to it at that time), I was in a hurry to buy fishes with my other friends @ classmates.
Then, at the pet shop, I was again in a bustle, finding fish and all the accsesories plus my other friends who didn't went along the pet shop ask me to do that errands too. It was really chaotic yesterday that I think the shoppers must be really confused and started to think that all of us are mad about fishes. Hahaha.. When all of them are settled already, we went back to our hostel and start to take a good care (I think XD) of our new pet. Signing in to all of my SNS, I saw them and me also posting about our new pet. It is a jubilant when all of my classmates have all of this pet and we start to share so many information and tips on taking a good care to our pet.
Then, last night, I was being able to reply the email regarding on the interview. Woahh... this is really exciting day, I thought. Too many things happen. When wo look outside, all of this things are all natural and not an uncommon things to be happen in our life, but for me to go through it, it had surely maximated my control of mind, heart and body. Means my physical, mental and emotion. Hahahaha.. now I'm growing.. XD
Kay.. that's all.
Bye from me
Ya know, yesterday, my heart had goes too many of 'doki-doki' and kind of bursting because yesterday, too many things happen. All the occasions make my heart jump too many times and my head was all unorganized because all of the things that happen were kind of unexpected and too rushing.
Fisrtly, I had my English classes and we'd done many activies and all of them were so fun that I'm become excited all over. Then, before I could realize, I had to do my presentation for my Special Ed subject (cause the mark will be added to my coursework) so I had this butterflies in my stomach, anxiously, ya know with my hands and feet went freezing and my heart pounds loudly which make me unable to calm myself. I felt that time like my heart almost burst and I'm afraid that I'll act uncontrollable...hhehe
Fortunately I was able to finish it smoothly (I think). My lecturer however won't tell us (since I do it with my partner) our mark (because for previous partners, he would told them). I hope it's all okay (since it will affect my pointer). Hahahha.. so I do care about my pointer.
Then, when I get to know from the PA of other subject (related to Special Ed too), that the lecturer want us to present our pet this Thursday, we all became so nervous and start to fussing around on a planning to buy our pet since many of us still don't have our own pet to get presented.
Then, while I'm waiting at the cafeteria for my other friends to go buying fish (as we decided to pet fish, since it's the most easy pet to take care of, at least until the day of presentation. XD), I had received an email on my application for a monitor tour to Chiba prefecture. It said that I was able to proceed to the next level which is the interview. Woahhhh....
I'm so happy that I could hug anyone (my only mahram, of course).... Although it is just an interview, too me it is the big accomplishment for myself since I did not accomplish anything in the past semester (I mean something meaningful like this, heee *too me, it's so meaningful, kayhh).
When, all of things didn't settle yet in my mind (I couldn't replied to it at that time), I was in a hurry to buy fishes with my other friends @ classmates.
Then, at the pet shop, I was again in a bustle, finding fish and all the accsesories plus my other friends who didn't went along the pet shop ask me to do that errands too. It was really chaotic yesterday that I think the shoppers must be really confused and started to think that all of us are mad about fishes. Hahaha.. When all of them are settled already, we went back to our hostel and start to take a good care (I think XD) of our new pet. Signing in to all of my SNS, I saw them and me also posting about our new pet. It is a jubilant when all of my classmates have all of this pet and we start to share so many information and tips on taking a good care to our pet.
Then, last night, I was being able to reply the email regarding on the interview. Woahh... this is really exciting day, I thought. Too many things happen. When wo look outside, all of this things are all natural and not an uncommon things to be happen in our life, but for me to go through it, it had surely maximated my control of mind, heart and body. Means my physical, mental and emotion. Hahahaha.. now I'm growing.. XD
Kay.. that's all.
Bye from me
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| Bye from me : 大木 |
Sunday, September 06, 2015
Updating Myself
Assalamualaikum.
I think I'm rarely have times nowadays as I grew up I realize I have to many things to do in this age. Looking back past this time, I think I had enough play times and always living in my world by not looking around and look things on different perspectives. I'd reviewed all my blog post in the past and I found them too embarrassing to be read because it's so immature. Hahahaha... just look in what ages I wrote that. If I have a time machine, I want to return to that time when I post that writing, a piece of advice and a quick smack on my 'young-head' would do.
Now I understand what I learn in class this days about human development (child-teen-adult). I can see the differences of my ways of communication, writing, how I develop my ideas and my thinking's pattern. It's all in an appropriate order. Though I'm really embarrassing with my old way of mine that I want to slap my face really hard, still I will not delete it cause in the future I can look back like this and say to myself, "I have come all this way to become like this." Somehow, it's kind of things that I hope I can say happily. Happy that maybe things would not go as I want, still I can look it in other viewpoint, realizing that life have got many tricks to tease us.
And oh. I'd already change this blog's name after almost two years using "Secondary Child" as a blog title. It is that I'm in my way on self-upgrading. I use "Secondary Child" before because I think that I'm a child in all the ways of my life with a little different from real child. But now, I use "Voikukka" which means 'Dandelion' in Finnish, to describe myself as I'm in a journey, leaving my old self (read it in a term of 'improving') to reach some achievement in my life, at least for people around me, family, etc.
Really, I think I have too many aspects of myself (first) that need to be improved before I can step out to enter other people's world. Thereto, on the way of engaging myself with this profession (a-teacher-to-be I hope), something must be done about me first. Okay, that's my point.
So, overall, I think this is a good pace for me to start.
Kay. Bye. WAssalamualaikum.
I think I'm rarely have times nowadays as I grew up I realize I have to many things to do in this age. Looking back past this time, I think I had enough play times and always living in my world by not looking around and look things on different perspectives. I'd reviewed all my blog post in the past and I found them too embarrassing to be read because it's so immature. Hahahaha... just look in what ages I wrote that. If I have a time machine, I want to return to that time when I post that writing, a piece of advice and a quick smack on my 'young-head' would do.
Now I understand what I learn in class this days about human development (child-teen-adult). I can see the differences of my ways of communication, writing, how I develop my ideas and my thinking's pattern. It's all in an appropriate order. Though I'm really embarrassing with my old way of mine that I want to slap my face really hard, still I will not delete it cause in the future I can look back like this and say to myself, "I have come all this way to become like this." Somehow, it's kind of things that I hope I can say happily. Happy that maybe things would not go as I want, still I can look it in other viewpoint, realizing that life have got many tricks to tease us.
And oh. I'd already change this blog's name after almost two years using "Secondary Child" as a blog title. It is that I'm in my way on self-upgrading. I use "Secondary Child" before because I think that I'm a child in all the ways of my life with a little different from real child. But now, I use "Voikukka" which means 'Dandelion' in Finnish, to describe myself as I'm in a journey, leaving my old self (read it in a term of 'improving') to reach some achievement in my life, at least for people around me, family, etc. Really, I think I have too many aspects of myself (first) that need to be improved before I can step out to enter other people's world. Thereto, on the way of engaging myself with this profession (a-teacher-to-be I hope), something must be done about me first. Okay, that's my point.
So, overall, I think this is a good pace for me to start.
Kay. Bye. WAssalamualaikum.
Thursday, November 06, 2014
Just a little .
i thought all of you generally...
i don't want to care other's people stuff that they might don't want other people to know.
just imagine you being in their's shoe. I can't tell this straight to your face because I don't want you to misunderstand me. You'd said that you don't care 'bout other people, yet you came at my place nagging about other people stuff. If you tell good part about people, yes I can accept it. But everyday, I come to hear from your mouth is other people's bad.
I don't want to judge people include you because you also have many good parts about yourself. I like you. It just that thing that I can't stand. But, to tell this directly you is just frightened me. I used to cry all day long and many days after that just because I keep my distance with others that I scared that I hurt them with my word. To say other people's bad to others, I try not to do that because my mom use to say to me, "don't ever insult or say this people is bad, this people do nothing but hurt other people or something, that someday we can't predict if Allah contradict our heart and we have no different with what we said to others earlier." So I choose not to say anything about other people's bad except it become a need if the person will endanger others. Other than that, I can't do it.
So, from the bottom of my heart, I want you to change that part of yours. I'm always read this saying that if you want to go to Jannah, take others with you or the others will pull you to the Jahannam.
Seriously, I'm also scared with that. I hope that I am strong enough to talk to you face to face than typing this, hoping that you'll read this and get what I want to deliver.
It's not that I'm a person with angelic heart or what, but I'm trying at least not to be a silent devil.
i don't want to care other's people stuff that they might don't want other people to know.
just imagine you being in their's shoe. I can't tell this straight to your face because I don't want you to misunderstand me. You'd said that you don't care 'bout other people, yet you came at my place nagging about other people stuff. If you tell good part about people, yes I can accept it. But everyday, I come to hear from your mouth is other people's bad.
I don't want to judge people include you because you also have many good parts about yourself. I like you. It just that thing that I can't stand. But, to tell this directly you is just frightened me. I used to cry all day long and many days after that just because I keep my distance with others that I scared that I hurt them with my word. To say other people's bad to others, I try not to do that because my mom use to say to me, "don't ever insult or say this people is bad, this people do nothing but hurt other people or something, that someday we can't predict if Allah contradict our heart and we have no different with what we said to others earlier." So I choose not to say anything about other people's bad except it become a need if the person will endanger others. Other than that, I can't do it.
So, from the bottom of my heart, I want you to change that part of yours. I'm always read this saying that if you want to go to Jannah, take others with you or the others will pull you to the Jahannam.
Seriously, I'm also scared with that. I hope that I am strong enough to talk to you face to face than typing this, hoping that you'll read this and get what I want to deliver.
It's not that I'm a person with angelic heart or what, but I'm trying at least not to be a silent devil.
Thursday, October 30, 2014
SubhanAllah
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim~
Setiap yang berlaku pasti ada sebabnya.
Setiap ujian pasti ada manisnya.
Tarbiah lah hati ini~ tahanlah gelodak jiwa.
Jauhilah ikhtilat..
Rasa sakit sangat nak tinggalkan perasaan tu. Nak jauhkan diri pun tak boleh sebab tugas. Sebab tu aku listkan dalam hati kenapa nak 5uk@ dia, apa yang aku boleh dapat kalau 5uk@ dia dan macam mana masa depan aku nanti kalau berterusan macam ni. Hmm... buat masa sekarang, macam ni jelah yang aku mampu buat.
Dulu aku pandang remeh benda ni, dalam hati selalu aku ingatkan atau tegaskan yang aku takkan terlibat dengan soal perasaan macam ni. Minat je pun pada mulanya aku ingatkan macam biasa-biasa je, macam aku minat orang lain jugak, tapi entah kenapa dah jadi makin kuat. Tambahan lagi, nak jauhkan diri dari ikhtilat yang ni memang agak susah sebab ikhtilat in my case adalah dalam kategori harus when my relation to this person is only because of duty.
So, I'll try to endure it myself, telling me that to take this feeling serious will not bring me anywhere or any good. But how long can I do this? To make things worse, this is my crucial moment as a student 'cause I have, exams coming. To handle two things at once isn't a good task for me to do.
I hope that I can always lower my gaze and also 'hijabing' my heart from this kind of feeling.
Mujahadah is the priority now.
I should think about my parents, my study, siblings and the most important thing is REDHA ALLAH in anything that I do. InsyaAllah. May Allah ease everything.
Anyway, I want to forget this feeling as soon as possible because it keep disturbing me. No matter what I do, his image will turn up in my mind. If people said that to cut this kind of feeling, you must cut any tie that can relates with him. But, what can I do because I'm bound by duty with him.
By any means, I'm still have to connect with him. It's hard to constrain our heart and mind from thinking about the person.
I know, yes my mind accept it that keeping this feeling wouldn't bring any good and I admit that doing things for Allah and Allah will reward you better than this but to climb to that level on be a able to constrain myself from things that "shouldn't" isn't an easy things.
I just have to do it~
Setiap yang berlaku pasti ada sebabnya.
Setiap ujian pasti ada manisnya.
Tarbiah lah hati ini~ tahanlah gelodak jiwa.
Jauhilah ikhtilat..
Rasa sakit sangat nak tinggalkan perasaan tu. Nak jauhkan diri pun tak boleh sebab tugas. Sebab tu aku listkan dalam hati kenapa nak 5uk@ dia, apa yang aku boleh dapat kalau 5uk@ dia dan macam mana masa depan aku nanti kalau berterusan macam ni. Hmm... buat masa sekarang, macam ni jelah yang aku mampu buat.
Dulu aku pandang remeh benda ni, dalam hati selalu aku ingatkan atau tegaskan yang aku takkan terlibat dengan soal perasaan macam ni. Minat je pun pada mulanya aku ingatkan macam biasa-biasa je, macam aku minat orang lain jugak, tapi entah kenapa dah jadi makin kuat. Tambahan lagi, nak jauhkan diri dari ikhtilat yang ni memang agak susah sebab ikhtilat in my case adalah dalam kategori harus when my relation to this person is only because of duty.
So, I'll try to endure it myself, telling me that to take this feeling serious will not bring me anywhere or any good. But how long can I do this? To make things worse, this is my crucial moment as a student 'cause I have, exams coming. To handle two things at once isn't a good task for me to do.
I hope that I can always lower my gaze and also 'hijabing' my heart from this kind of feeling.
Mujahadah is the priority now.
I should think about my parents, my study, siblings and the most important thing is REDHA ALLAH in anything that I do. InsyaAllah. May Allah ease everything.
Anyway, I want to forget this feeling as soon as possible because it keep disturbing me. No matter what I do, his image will turn up in my mind. If people said that to cut this kind of feeling, you must cut any tie that can relates with him. But, what can I do because I'm bound by duty with him.
By any means, I'm still have to connect with him. It's hard to constrain our heart and mind from thinking about the person.
I know, yes my mind accept it that keeping this feeling wouldn't bring any good and I admit that doing things for Allah and Allah will reward you better than this but to climb to that level on be a able to constrain myself from things that "shouldn't" isn't an easy things.
I just have to do it~
Saturday, October 25, 2014
Liebster Award~ I've done it !
Assalamualaikum~
[post yang lebih 'proper' selepas kurang dari setengah jam post a depressed entry]
Okey, saya sedang menyahut satu tag post (ye kot, tak tahu apa orang panggil ni) oleh Kak Anisah tiba-tiba terperasan ada sesuatu kat shoutbox~ hmm... okey..
tak tahu kenapa saya dipilih.... tapi sebelum ni saya tengah depressed sikit, 'feels like emotion been crampled' tapi sekarang saya sedar, Allah nak bagi tahu melalui cara ni yang 'everything must have a reason to occur'. Bersyukur sangat sebab dapat sedar benda macam tu.
It his how Allah create the happiness. Now I really get it and feel it when there are a saying that " He gives us thunder and rain so we can see the rainbow and realize that our world is better than that". Yeah, he want us to change our view of perspective. I get it. Terima kasih Allah.
Okey, habis dah bab tu, kita tengok benda ni pulak, katanya, ni merupakan Liebster Award. Tak faham? Try bukak link blog tu.. Fahamkan.. Hehe... Maaf kalau rasa nak hempuk blog saya ni sebab kena bazirkan kuota internet buka blog lain pulak... Tapi, betul... maafkan kemalasan saya yang melampau ni... jangan marah ~ XD
Sekarang, saya jawab pula soalan yang cik'N ajukan..
1)Zodiak dan umur anda?
zodiak ialah si kambing gurun. Ye, saya si capricorn yang akan sambut hari lahir ke 18 pada 31/12 ni.
2)Genre music bagaimana yang anda suka dan siapa the lattest menjadi kegilaan anda?
Semua jenis genre, tak kira pop, rock, ballad, nasyid tapi setakat ni tak rela dengan hard metal ke apa ke yang agak 'mengarut' tu. The lattest punya tak pasti sangat, tapi setakat ni yang Hey! Say! JUMP dengan JPOP/ROCK yang lain...
3)Adakah anda peminat novel?jika ye,apa pendapat anda tentang karya melur jelita?
Minat la jugak novel walaupun dah tak baca sangat sekarang... Saya pernah dengar je nama Melur Jelita tapi tak pernah lagi baca karya beliau.
4)Adakah anda sukakan barangan brandy dan nyatakan sebabnya?
What kind of brandy? suka jugak, tapi tengok atas jenis. Barang yang berjenama ni senang sikit nak claim kalau rosak ke apa sebab diorang dah ada imej. *Uwaahh, jahat molep*
5)Adakah anda seorang yang boros?
Sebelum ni tak sangat tapi bila dah duduk jauh dari family, jadi boros la jugak.... sikit... bila beli makanan..
6)Pendapat anda tentang makanan segera yang menjadi isu?
Isu? Apa? Maaf la kalau saya ni macam katak bawah tempurung besi... Tau makan je...
7)Pendapat anda tentang perokok?
Bau busuk. Bazir duit. Gigi hodoh. Meng'kaya'kan Israel dan konco-konconya.
8)Ciri2 blog yang macam mana anda suka baca?*menarik bagi anda
Blog yang ringkas, tak ada widget pelik-pelik yang menyebabkan internet kuota saya habis kalau nak bukak, tak ada lagu yang tiba-tiba ada dan menyebabkan saya tutup terus blog tu. Isi menarik dan bukan jenis 'publicity-demanded-post' macam post yang cerita pasal kes buruk orang lain. I want to know the story of the owner, not others story who've been transformed into others.
9)Apakah perkara yang pernah memalukan,yang pernah anda lakukan?
Banyak sangat *because I'm self-conscious person*.
10)Apakah detik paling bahagia yang terjadi dalam hidup anda?
Bila saya mampu fikir yang saya orang yang bahagia dan dirahmati.
11)Pendapat anda tentang blog weirdlavender.blogspot.com ?
Simple blog, nice decorate. Mula-mula masuk rasa tenang sikit sebab bila selongkar blog ni, I got a a feeling that she know what she want to express. Cheh, macam pakar sangat saya ni bila nak 'judge' orang lain.
Okey, ni pulak soalan yang saya kemukakan pada anda-anda yang di 'tag' ye.. Bersedialah~ hehe..
*macam Naruto pulak*
Pada 11 yang di tag ni, I've chain this game to you ~
Lastly, sorry if i did any mistake in writing this. Sorry if you annoyed with my 'Manglish' writing because this way, I'll be more honest in delivering words. Malay is to bold for me to express my word from my heart.
Until then. jya~
[post yang lebih 'proper' selepas kurang dari setengah jam post a depressed entry]
Okey, saya sedang menyahut satu tag post (ye kot, tak tahu apa orang panggil ni) oleh Kak Anisah tiba-tiba terperasan ada sesuatu kat shoutbox~ hmm... okey..
tak tahu kenapa saya dipilih.... tapi sebelum ni saya tengah depressed sikit, 'feels like emotion been crampled' tapi sekarang saya sedar, Allah nak bagi tahu melalui cara ni yang 'everything must have a reason to occur'. Bersyukur sangat sebab dapat sedar benda macam tu.
It his how Allah create the happiness. Now I really get it and feel it when there are a saying that " He gives us thunder and rain so we can see the rainbow and realize that our world is better than that". Yeah, he want us to change our view of perspective. I get it. Terima kasih Allah.
Okey, habis dah bab tu, kita tengok benda ni pulak, katanya, ni merupakan Liebster Award. Tak faham? Try bukak link blog tu.. Fahamkan.. Hehe... Maaf kalau rasa nak hempuk blog saya ni sebab kena bazirkan kuota internet buka blog lain pulak... Tapi, betul... maafkan kemalasan saya yang melampau ni... jangan marah ~ XD
Sekarang, saya jawab pula soalan yang cik'N ajukan..
1)Zodiak dan umur anda?
zodiak ialah si kambing gurun. Ye, saya si capricorn yang akan sambut hari lahir ke 18 pada 31/12 ni.
2)Genre music bagaimana yang anda suka dan siapa the lattest menjadi kegilaan anda?
Semua jenis genre, tak kira pop, rock, ballad, nasyid tapi setakat ni tak rela dengan hard metal ke apa ke yang agak 'mengarut' tu. The lattest punya tak pasti sangat, tapi setakat ni yang Hey! Say! JUMP dengan JPOP/ROCK yang lain...
3)Adakah anda peminat novel?jika ye,apa pendapat anda tentang karya melur jelita?
Minat la jugak novel walaupun dah tak baca sangat sekarang... Saya pernah dengar je nama Melur Jelita tapi tak pernah lagi baca karya beliau.
4)Adakah anda sukakan barangan brandy dan nyatakan sebabnya?
What kind of brandy? suka jugak, tapi tengok atas jenis. Barang yang berjenama ni senang sikit nak claim kalau rosak ke apa sebab diorang dah ada imej. *Uwaahh, jahat molep*
5)Adakah anda seorang yang boros?
Sebelum ni tak sangat tapi bila dah duduk jauh dari family, jadi boros la jugak.... sikit... bila beli makanan..
6)Pendapat anda tentang makanan segera yang menjadi isu?
Isu? Apa? Maaf la kalau saya ni macam katak bawah tempurung besi... Tau makan je...
7)Pendapat anda tentang perokok?
Bau busuk. Bazir duit. Gigi hodoh. Meng'kaya'kan Israel dan konco-konconya.
8)Ciri2 blog yang macam mana anda suka baca?*menarik bagi anda
Blog yang ringkas, tak ada widget pelik-pelik yang menyebabkan internet kuota saya habis kalau nak bukak, tak ada lagu yang tiba-tiba ada dan menyebabkan saya tutup terus blog tu. Isi menarik dan bukan jenis 'publicity-demanded-post' macam post yang cerita pasal kes buruk orang lain. I want to know the story of the owner, not others story who've been transformed into others.
9)Apakah perkara yang pernah memalukan,yang pernah anda lakukan?
Banyak sangat *because I'm self-conscious person*.
10)Apakah detik paling bahagia yang terjadi dalam hidup anda?
Bila saya mampu fikir yang saya orang yang bahagia dan dirahmati.
11)Pendapat anda tentang blog weirdlavender.blogspot.com ?
Simple blog, nice decorate. Mula-mula masuk rasa tenang sikit sebab bila selongkar blog ni, I got a a feeling that she know what she want to express. Cheh, macam pakar sangat saya ni bila nak 'judge' orang lain.
Okey, ni pulak soalan yang saya kemukakan pada anda-anda yang di 'tag' ye.. Bersedialah~ hehe..
*macam Naruto pulak*
1. Siapa kawan baik awak?
2. Apa perasaan awak sekarang?
3. Mana lagi sedap, teh ke susu? Ke tak minum dua dua?
4. Masa kecil atau sekarang, pernah main tak baling selipar/bola kaki tiga/bola rusa/berkaitan selipar? Best kan kalau dapat hempuk muka orang masa main permainan tu?
5. Pusing ke kanan, pastu tulis apa yang awak tengok
6. Suka tak duduk kat Malaysia?
7. Apa yang awak nak buat kalau awak perdana menteri Malaysia?
8. Apa perasaan mak awak sekarang? Cuba teka/tanya?
9. Masa kecil dulu nak jadi apa?
10. Apakah dunia ni dalam pandangan awak?
11. Dalam 3 patah perkataan, nyatakan diri awak.
Pada 11 yang di tag ni, I've chain this game to you ~
Lastly, sorry if i did any mistake in writing this. Sorry if you annoyed with my 'Manglish' writing because this way, I'll be more honest in delivering words. Malay is to bold for me to express my word from my heart.
Until then. jya~
I t i s s o m e t i m e s
i miss my 'kazoku'. i want to babble many things~ i want to act my ownself, i want to express myself better~ it just to exhausting to kept all inside. i want to laugh, do stupid things, act all mad suddenly mumbling something that i don't get it myself and so on. but here, i have to watch everything that i do. I've come to hate it. it had make me tired. I scared to act my ownself cause I don't want people to hate me. I want to express myself... really
Oh, I need my 'kazoku'.
Sighing~ everything seems so wrong. I'm always depressed here, not knowing what to do to make myself feel better. I can't act like I'm 'tensai' person. Seeing everyone doing the obligatory things just make myself feel very wrong. I feel like I did a very big crime...
I hate the way I think, it's negative ! My inner self is rotten, maybe. What should I do to make myself feel better, really.
Thinking about my own self, it always depressing. I want to tell it loud, my feeling. This unsecure, unsure, not very optimistic. What had make me like this?
Way to complicate! Though it just me who complicated the things.
Woah, I remember when I want to escape from study at home, to keep me feel unashamed I did the chores such as washing dishes, sweeping floor, tidying my room and other just to escape from studying back then.
But here, it just study or having an entertainment. Study, okay, I feel like I'm a 'tensai' person, but doing other than that here make me feel like I'm really bad person, like I'm doing some crime that I can't attone it in future.
It's very suffocating, keeping a thought like this. I want to 'yell' my heart out..... telling it to other person here, I wonder if they listen to me. Rather than having my heart broken, 'unlistened-to' I choose to have a heart broken when keeping this thought deeply.
White and black. Red and blue. Sky and land. It's good to be contrast for awhile. It's a relieved to be able to know what should and shouldn't and also to stand to it.
Fall in love. Recently, it had bothered my mind and a bit my 'heart'? By the way, it annoyed me. It annoyed me when the thoughts always there. What a weird process to a person!
Hateful. Unsatisfation. Hard. Clueless. A bit jealousy. Unsecure.
Oh, I need my 'kazoku'.
Sighing~ everything seems so wrong. I'm always depressed here, not knowing what to do to make myself feel better. I can't act like I'm 'tensai' person. Seeing everyone doing the obligatory things just make myself feel very wrong. I feel like I did a very big crime...
I hate the way I think, it's negative ! My inner self is rotten, maybe. What should I do to make myself feel better, really.
Thinking about my own self, it always depressing. I want to tell it loud, my feeling. This unsecure, unsure, not very optimistic. What had make me like this?
Way to complicate! Though it just me who complicated the things.
Woah, I remember when I want to escape from study at home, to keep me feel unashamed I did the chores such as washing dishes, sweeping floor, tidying my room and other just to escape from studying back then.
But here, it just study or having an entertainment. Study, okay, I feel like I'm a 'tensai' person, but doing other than that here make me feel like I'm really bad person, like I'm doing some crime that I can't attone it in future.
It's very suffocating, keeping a thought like this. I want to 'yell' my heart out..... telling it to other person here, I wonder if they listen to me. Rather than having my heart broken, 'unlistened-to' I choose to have a heart broken when keeping this thought deeply.
White and black. Red and blue. Sky and land. It's good to be contrast for awhile. It's a relieved to be able to know what should and shouldn't and also to stand to it.
Fall in love. Recently, it had bothered my mind and a bit my 'heart'? By the way, it annoyed me. It annoyed me when the thoughts always there. What a weird process to a person!
Hateful. Unsatisfation. Hard. Clueless. A bit jealousy. Unsecure.
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Update ; hari raya ^0^
Assalamualaikumwarahmatullahiwabarakatuh~
Ha, kan dah panjang salam tu bila dah berkurun aku tak menjenguk ke blog ni. Hehe....
Hari ni dah masuk hari raya ke-5. Hmm.. sejak hujung ramadhan sampai hari ni, kalau nak keluar rumah, memang berejam duduk atas jalan raya tu *ehem, bukan duduk atas jalan, duduk dalam kereta atas jalan, mau cari nahas duduk atas jalan*
Sekarang ni, rasa pening sangat dok pikir pasal kerja kursus. Dah la semua subjek ada kerja kursus, rasa macam nak pitam pulak.
Oh ya, hari tu aku ada buat entri pasal temuduga IPG, alhamdulillah sekarang ni, aku dapat belajar di IPG KPM dalam subjek Pendidikan Khas Masalah Pembelajaran. Macam best kan? Ahahaha..... Takdelah, semua subjek best. Yang ni pun pilih dulu sebab walid kata, "give it a try" bila aku kata tak tahu minat yang mana satu. Walaupun sebenarnya walid kata banyak kelebihan guru pendidikan khas ni yang orang tak tahu.
Lecturer yang juga dipanggil cikgu tu pun kata sebenarnya banyak lagi cabang bagi pendidikan khas, bukan sahaja dalam pendidikan, pentadbiran pun boleh (tapi jangan lari bidang sudahlah).
Okey, habis pasal pendidikan khas tu, sekarang nak cerita pasal raya pula. Hmm... raya tahun ni tak adalah meriah mana macam tahun-tahun dulu. Mungkin sebab aku duduk jauh kot, rasa malas pulak nak jalan-jalan bila dapat balik rumah ni.
Sebenarnya kat rumah ni pun, takde langsung persiapan raya. Kalau rumah orang lain mungkin dengan biskut rayanya, langsir baru, perabot baru, hiasan rumah dan sebagainya. Tapi kat rumah aku ni, memang tak ada lah tu semua. Yang ada cuma baju raya je. Tapi, tak apalah, lebih baik dari tak ada terus kan? Entahlah, tak muncul pun semangat nak raya. Masa duduk kat hostel cuma ada semangat nak balik je, bukan nak raya.
Tambahan pulak bila dengar krisis Israel-Palestin ni, memang tawar hati nak bermeriah-meriahan dengan raya. Terkenang rakyat Palestin yang menyambut raya dengan bedilan, roket bom dan sebagainya sedangkan kita kat Malaysia sambut raya dengan mercun, bunga api bagai.
Raya kali ni buat ala kadar je, InsyaAllah raya haji ni lebih meriah *walaupun kemungkinan aku tak dapat balik, huuuu.. sedih T^T*
Sedih jugak sebenarnya raya ni, tak ada kesempatan lagi nak jumpa sepupu yang tercinta, cik Ain Senget.. Hahaha.. tak adalah.... rindu nak jumpa dia. Almaklumlah, geng yang sehati sejiwa, semuanya nak buat secara berjemaah bila dah berjumpa. Hehe...
Uwaa.... rindu... Mintak-mintaklah Allah panjangkan jodoh kami boleh bertemu lagi.... Waduhh.. macam lirik lagu pulak..
Tapi takut tak sempat sebab kemungkinan dia balik ke KL dah hari ni dan aku balik Melaka dah esok... Huhu..sedihnya.
Tak apalah, panjang jodoh jumpa lagi kan?...
hmmm.. banyak dah kot merapu, tak apalah assalamualaikum dan
selamat hari raya ~ ^0^
Ha, kan dah panjang salam tu bila dah berkurun aku tak menjenguk ke blog ni. Hehe....
Hari ni dah masuk hari raya ke-5. Hmm.. sejak hujung ramadhan sampai hari ni, kalau nak keluar rumah, memang berejam duduk atas jalan raya tu *ehem, bukan duduk atas jalan, duduk dalam kereta atas jalan, mau cari nahas duduk atas jalan*
Sekarang ni, rasa pening sangat dok pikir pasal kerja kursus. Dah la semua subjek ada kerja kursus, rasa macam nak pitam pulak.
Oh ya, hari tu aku ada buat entri pasal temuduga IPG, alhamdulillah sekarang ni, aku dapat belajar di IPG KPM dalam subjek Pendidikan Khas Masalah Pembelajaran. Macam best kan? Ahahaha..... Takdelah, semua subjek best. Yang ni pun pilih dulu sebab walid kata, "give it a try" bila aku kata tak tahu minat yang mana satu. Walaupun sebenarnya walid kata banyak kelebihan guru pendidikan khas ni yang orang tak tahu.
Lecturer yang juga dipanggil cikgu tu pun kata sebenarnya banyak lagi cabang bagi pendidikan khas, bukan sahaja dalam pendidikan, pentadbiran pun boleh (tapi jangan lari bidang sudahlah).
Okey, habis pasal pendidikan khas tu, sekarang nak cerita pasal raya pula. Hmm... raya tahun ni tak adalah meriah mana macam tahun-tahun dulu. Mungkin sebab aku duduk jauh kot, rasa malas pulak nak jalan-jalan bila dapat balik rumah ni.
Sebenarnya kat rumah ni pun, takde langsung persiapan raya. Kalau rumah orang lain mungkin dengan biskut rayanya, langsir baru, perabot baru, hiasan rumah dan sebagainya. Tapi kat rumah aku ni, memang tak ada lah tu semua. Yang ada cuma baju raya je. Tapi, tak apalah, lebih baik dari tak ada terus kan? Entahlah, tak muncul pun semangat nak raya. Masa duduk kat hostel cuma ada semangat nak balik je, bukan nak raya.
Tambahan pulak bila dengar krisis Israel-Palestin ni, memang tawar hati nak bermeriah-meriahan dengan raya. Terkenang rakyat Palestin yang menyambut raya dengan bedilan, roket bom dan sebagainya sedangkan kita kat Malaysia sambut raya dengan mercun, bunga api bagai.
Raya kali ni buat ala kadar je, InsyaAllah raya haji ni lebih meriah *walaupun kemungkinan aku tak dapat balik, huuuu.. sedih T^T*
Sedih jugak sebenarnya raya ni, tak ada kesempatan lagi nak jumpa sepupu yang tercinta, cik Ain Senget.. Hahaha.. tak adalah.... rindu nak jumpa dia. Almaklumlah, geng yang sehati sejiwa, semuanya nak buat secara berjemaah bila dah berjumpa. Hehe...
Uwaa.... rindu... Mintak-mintaklah Allah panjangkan jodoh kami boleh bertemu lagi.... Waduhh.. macam lirik lagu pulak..
Tapi takut tak sempat sebab kemungkinan dia balik ke KL dah hari ni dan aku balik Melaka dah esok... Huhu..sedihnya.
Tak apalah, panjang jodoh jumpa lagi kan?...
hmmm.. banyak dah kot merapu, tak apalah assalamualaikum dan
selamat hari raya ~ ^0^
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Temu duga IPG 2014 ▎Pendidikan Khas ▎
~Bismillahirrahmanirrahim~
Assalamualaikum ^_^
Konnichiwa ☺
Hari ni terdetik nak cerita pasal hal semalam iaitu Temuduga IPG (untuk subjek Pendidikan Khas SK) pengambilan 2014 dekat IPG Kampus Kota Bharu, Pengkalan Chepa. *Eheh, tempat sama masa UKCG* Okey, semalam 15/4 hari Khamis, aku sesi yang ke empat (akhir sekali) pukul 2:30 petang. Masa semakan tiba-tiba ada pulak masa pendaftaran pukul 8:00 pagi. Tahun ni tak ada sesi temuduga individu, cuma ada sesi berkumpulan. Walaupun sebenarnya ada soalan berbentuk individu dalam kumpulan tu.
Mulanya aku pelik la jugak. Pendaftaran pukul 8 pagi tapi masa temuduga pukul 2:30. Takkanlah nak tunggu sampai pukul 2:30? Tapi bila baca dalam group fb yang pihak penemuduga tu akan bagi taklimat, aku pun datang awal lah jugak. Hurmm...
Oh ya, sehari sebelumnya, masa aku dok kat rumah, oto-san (Walid) ada telefon, suruh cari baju kurung batik dan kalau boleh buat name tag. Lalu dengan kelam kabutnya aku ajak abe pergi cari kedai yang boleh siapkan name tag hari tu juga.
Okei, berbalik pada hari temuduga. Sampai aje kat sana, aku dah boleh nampak bilik temuduga dan terus aku tandatangan pada kertas senarai nama bagi sesi yang ditetapkan (sesi keempat *last sekali*). Bangunan macam bangunan sekolah rendah yang kebanyakannya tak bertingkat. Masa tu, pihak penemuduga sedang bagi taklimat pada calon (termasuk aku) yang duduk di luar bilik temuduga. Dia cuma bagi tahu macam mana cara nak susun sijil dan jenis sijil yang diperlukan iaitu :
- Borang maklumat diri (di print dari laman web KPM)
- Salinan sijil kelahiran
- Salinan kad pengenalan
- Salinan slip SPM
- Salinan sijil ko-kurikulum (sejak dari ting. 4 sampai ting.5 ikut peringkat *peringkat tertinggi di atas sekali*)
- Perakuan diri (IPG dan sekolah *yang di print kat laman web KPM*
Masa nak tunggu sesi yang keempat tu, aku berkenal-kenalan jugak lah dengan calon-calon lain. Salah seorangnya ialah Masturah. Dia baru balik dari Sabah sebab dia dah sekolah kat sabah sejak sekolah rendah jadi bila habis SPM teus dia balik Kelantan. Bila aku tengok sijil-sijil dia, melopong jugak, dengan sijil pidato, pantun, tilawah, tokoh maulidur rasul, dan sebagainya, macam-macam peringkat pulak tu. Aku pulak sedih jer, ada sijil kem dengan merentas desa aje, tu pun peringkat sekolah *yang dipaksa terlibat* .
Masa aku dok menunggu tu, aku bincang bincang jugak dengan rakan sekumpulan, antaranya ialah Masturah, Farhana, dan Fatin, yang lain-lain aku kenal masa hampir nak masuk bilik temuduga je. Sebenarnya ramai jugak budak sekolah sendiri yang aku jumpa, dahla amik satu subjek dengan aku, 4 orang semuanya. Tapi mujur aku tak sama sesi dengan mereka (kecuali sorang budak laki yang tak sekelas dengan aku), kalau tak segan jugak sebab satu sekolah.
Masa tu ada jugak calon yang datang lewat jadi kumpulan untuk sesi dia ni kekurangan orang jadi pihak penemuduga ambil ahli sesi seterusnya. Yang lewat tu pulak kena masuk sesi lain, dahla kena marah *tapi tak keras sangat*. Kalau dekat tempat lain (IPG lain) yang aku dengar, walaupun lewat lima minit je, dah dibatalkan kelayakan, tapi pihak penemuduga kat sini masih bagi peluang. Jadi kesimpulannya dalam hal ni, kena datang awal.
Sebenarnya bila dapat tahu je pengesahan temuduga tu, terus aku cari maklumat pasal pendidikan khas dan pendidikan negara. Antara maklumat yang aku cari ialah pasal ciri-ciri murid pendidikan khas, falsafah pendidikan khas, dan apa-apa je yang berkaitan dengan pendidikan khas.
Tapi masa berjumpa dengan calon-calon lain terutamanya Masturah aku dapat tengok maklumat yang dia cari agak lebih berkesan dan terperinci. Dia tulis dalam buku nota kecil pasal jenis murid pendidikan khas, pengelasan, ciri-ciri dan sebagainya. Tapi hari tu, kami betul-betul bincang dan berkongsi maklumat pasal apa yang kami tahu.
Emm, sebelum temuduga, aku ada jumpa dengan seorang pensyarah kat IPG ni yang merupakan kenalan Farhana, jadi kami tiga orang ni pergilah jumpa dia untuk dapatkan sedikit tips dan ilmu. Antaranya :
- Kena guna istilah2 dalam pendidikan khas, tapi mestilah dalam bahasa baku seperti hiperaktif, disleksia, serebral palsi, autistik dan sebagainya (tapi kalau istilah BI yang dah tak boleh diterjemahkan, boleh juga diguna)
- Mesti jaga eye contact dengan penemu duga dan calon lain, jadikannya seperti perbincangan/forum
- Boleh guna point orang lain dan digubah dalam penerangan sendiri atau tambah penerangan orang lain contohnya "Saya bersetuju dengan pendapat saudara/i, namun saya ingin menambah lagi........ "/ "Saya berpendapat bahawa ........ " / "Saranan saya ........ "
- Boleh guna pengalaman sendiri kalau ada, contohnya "Saya pernah bergaul dengan seorang kanak-kanak yang mempunyai masalah autistik dan saya dapati mereka ini ............ " ➡ "Jadi saya rasa mereka perlulah diajar menggunakan cara begini .......... " ➡ " Oleh itu, mereka pasti dapat ........... "
- Jangan sekali-kali memotong percakapan orang lain
- Tunjukkan muka yang manis, jangan nampak gugup sebaliknya perlulah kelihatan berkeyakinan
- Duduk tegak, jangan mengerak-gerakkan lutut (macam orang nak jahit baju), tangan di atas paha sendiri
- Masa bercakap, jangan terlalu cepat dan jangan terlalu lambat
- Nada mestilah bersesuaian, jangan terlampau keras (macam baca buku) atau jangan terlampau beremosi
- Jangan monopoli perbincangan itu, buat secara berkumpulan dan perlu kelihatan bekerjasama dengan calon lain
Bila tiba giliran kami, dengan hati yang penuh debaran kami masuk. Masa nak duduk tu mereka dah aturkan tempat. Tempat aku dekat hujung sekali. Mula mula P1 (penemuduga 1) *dua2 penemuduga tu lelaki* terangkan yang dalam temuduga ini, mula2 mereka akan tanyakan satu video dan soalan mereka berdasarkan video tersebut yang dikaitkan dengan subjek pendidikan khas. Video yang mereka tayangkan untuk kumpulan kami ialah video pasal atlit ni. (Kumpulan lain berbeza videonya, ada video pasal hari guru)
Dalam sesi ini, akan ada 5 pusingan soalan. Pusingan pertama masa yang diberikan oleh setiap calon ialah 1 minit, pusingan pertama 2 minit, pusingan ke 3, 3 minit, pusingan ke empat empat minit dan pusingan kelima tidak dihadkan masa untuk bercakap. Namun yang terakhir sekali adalah soalan yang menjurus kepada peribadi dalam bahasa inggeris kepada setiap calon.
(Sebenarnya tak ingat sangat secara tepat apakah soalannya, tapi lebih kurang beginilah)
Soalan 1 : Apakah perasaan anda sebagai seorang guru pendidikan khas apabila melihat usaha atlet berkenaan?
Soalan 2 : Sebagai seorang guru pendidikan khas, bagaimanakah anda boleh melibatkan murid pendidikan khas dalam pelbagai aktiviti kokurikulum, bermain bola sepak misalnya.
Soalan 3 : Bagaimanakah pendapat anda bagi meluaskan potensi dan kewujudan murid pendidikan khas.
Soalan 4 : Pada pendapat anda, bagaimana cara meningkatkan taraf kehidupan murid pendidikan khas ini nanti?
Soalan 5 : Sebagai seorang warganegara, apakah langkah yang sesuai boleh dilakukan bagi memberi kesedaran kepada setiap masyarakat bagi menghargai murid pendidikan khas ini?
Soalan peribadi : Tell me about your family background.
Untuk soalan peribadi ni, dia cuma bagi 1 minit. Lepas habis tu, dia mintak seorang-seorang mula dengan aku bangun dan berjalan di hadapan mereka sambil ambil fail dan keluar. Wah, yang ni aku jalan macam robot sikit sebab sakit kaki pakai kasut bertumit tu. Dahlah hujung dia tirus macam tu, memang sakit sangat kaki ni.
Ada orang lain yang bila habis tu pihak penemuduga tu panggil sebab fail dia tak lengkap. Sorang calon laki ni tak ada slip asal SPM lepas tu penemuduga tu cakap
"Macam mana saya nak sahkan ni kalau slip asal tak ada?"
Lepas tu, aku tak tahu macam mana..
Agak lama jugak tempoh temuduga tu. Kami masuk pukul 2:15, habis pukul 3:20. Lebih kurang sejam jugak lah. Mujur aku pakai kot, gugup campur dengan sejuknya aircond tu, boleh beku otak rasanya. Hehe
Okey, aku rasa setakat itu sajalah perkongsian yang boleh aku cerita.
Tata, Assalamualaikum.
Jyaa nee ^_^
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Relation
Asslamualaikum and Hi~
Konnichiwa ^_^
But, as we grew old, it seems that that kind of 'rely' doesn't matter anymore. We don't make that relation anymore. We keep the distance creating a big wall to exclude the people who should we rely to.
Who said that family/person that we love is the most comfortable place to being with? If it the most comfortable place, why could we have various of misunderstands or something that we unsatisfied with?
Because comfortable to being with mean there's only one sided relationship. They care about us without us thinking about them. That had make us comfortable. But, having family means we have to think about each other and that life should be.
We may have an awkward moment even if it just with our family. But I think it means that we have thoughts so much for their sake and same way goes with them.
Sometimes I really want to say something that always bugging my mind but I realize I can't do that because it might hurt other, so I just bury it deep in my heart or mind.
To be myself isn't matter if it just to hurt other. Does it true? Because that what I always thought.
But, it just like me. No, I'm not saying that I never hurt other, I do realize that I hurt others too but somehow to speak my mind and let go of certain feeling doesn't bring any good to anyone. So I'll just shut it up. I'll revive somehow.
It's relationship ya know ... ^_^
Thought about each other, rely on them, decide our things together. I don't want to miss this ever in my life. Though now I just being slow at it but somehow I'll work on it!
Yosh, ganbaruzo~ \\(^0^)//
Then, jyaa nee *wave*
Assalamualaikum ^_^
Konnichiwa ^_^
People are related with each other. No one can survive without another.In this world, we live depend on each other whether they are our family, friends or someone that we trust. It is a bold lie if we said that we don't rely on anyone because start from our born life, we already depend on the person who delivers us to this world. And then we keep to walk our life before clearing our path.
But, as we grew old, it seems that that kind of 'rely' doesn't matter anymore. We don't make that relation anymore. We keep the distance creating a big wall to exclude the people who should we rely to.
Who said that family/person that we love is the most comfortable place to being with? If it the most comfortable place, why could we have various of misunderstands or something that we unsatisfied with?
Because comfortable to being with mean there's only one sided relationship. They care about us without us thinking about them. That had make us comfortable. But, having family means we have to think about each other and that life should be.
We may have an awkward moment even if it just with our family. But I think it means that we have thoughts so much for their sake and same way goes with them.
Sometimes I really want to say something that always bugging my mind but I realize I can't do that because it might hurt other, so I just bury it deep in my heart or mind.
To be myself isn't matter if it just to hurt other. Does it true? Because that what I always thought.
But, it just like me. No, I'm not saying that I never hurt other, I do realize that I hurt others too but somehow to speak my mind and let go of certain feeling doesn't bring any good to anyone. So I'll just shut it up. I'll revive somehow.
It's relationship ya know ... ^_^
Thought about each other, rely on them, decide our things together. I don't want to miss this ever in my life. Though now I just being slow at it but somehow I'll work on it!
Yosh, ganbaruzo~ \\(^0^)//
Then, jyaa nee *wave*
Assalamualaikum ^_^
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Majlis Kecemerlangan SPM 2013
Assalamualaikum,
Salam Rejab ^_^
Sebenarnya tadi aku baru je balik dari majlis dinner kat sekolah untuk anugerah pelajar cemerlang SPM. So yeah, a bit exhausted and not really happy since this kind of occassion is not my fondness at all though I'm one of the students that were celebrated there.
Start pukul 8 dan habis pukul 10.30. Tapiiii... tu dalam tentatif program. Yang sebenarnya mula pukul 8.45 dan habis pukul 11 malam. Aku ni punya lah gabra sampai pukul 8.10 ingatkan dah lewat sebab cikgu pesan suruh datang sebelum pukul 8 untuk pendaftaran pastu dengan bersedia untuk masuk dewan apa.
Haha. To be truth, memang dari mula aku taknak datang majlis ni 'cause it really make me feel troubled. Macam2 alasan aku bagi kat Umi sebab taknak pergi. Pastu umi cakap lah nanti tua2 mesti terkenang balik pastu mula lah rasa menyesal tak ikut aktiviti sekolah. Lagipun umi kata cikgu2 penat2 prepare untuk majlis ni. Jadi, aku pun paksa jugak untuk pergi.
Tapi kan, sebenarnya tak best mana pun. Makan2 pastu naik pentas amik sijil dan snap picture banyak2 (orang lain je banyak, aku tukang tengok je). Then balik. Em. that's all. Not so much to be remembered.
Part yang aku paling boring ialah untuk snapping picture tu. Remaja zaman sekarang memang gila selfie eh. Aku rasa masa tu, setiap saat ada je 'snap', 'flash' dan seangkatan dengannya. Aku cuma di 'snap' masa terima sijil. Tu je..
Okay, that's all.
Nothing more to rant about (I think so)
Then, jyaa ^0^
Assalamualaikum
Salam Rejab ^_^
Sebenarnya tadi aku baru je balik dari majlis dinner kat sekolah untuk anugerah pelajar cemerlang SPM. So yeah, a bit exhausted and not really happy since this kind of occassion is not my fondness at all though I'm one of the students that were celebrated there.
Start pukul 8 dan habis pukul 10.30. Tapiiii... tu dalam tentatif program. Yang sebenarnya mula pukul 8.45 dan habis pukul 11 malam. Aku ni punya lah gabra sampai pukul 8.10 ingatkan dah lewat sebab cikgu pesan suruh datang sebelum pukul 8 untuk pendaftaran pastu dengan bersedia untuk masuk dewan apa.
Haha. To be truth, memang dari mula aku taknak datang majlis ni 'cause it really make me feel troubled. Macam2 alasan aku bagi kat Umi sebab taknak pergi. Pastu umi cakap lah nanti tua2 mesti terkenang balik pastu mula lah rasa menyesal tak ikut aktiviti sekolah. Lagipun umi kata cikgu2 penat2 prepare untuk majlis ni. Jadi, aku pun paksa jugak untuk pergi.
 |
| If you can see (me) kat atas sekali, kedua dari kiri (yang tersembul kepala saja tu) |
Tapi kan, sebenarnya tak best mana pun. Makan2 pastu naik pentas amik sijil dan snap picture banyak2 (orang lain je banyak, aku tukang tengok je). Then balik. Em. that's all. Not so much to be remembered.
Part yang aku paling boring ialah untuk snapping picture tu. Remaja zaman sekarang memang gila selfie eh. Aku rasa masa tu, setiap saat ada je 'snap', 'flash' dan seangkatan dengannya. Aku cuma di 'snap' masa terima sijil. Tu je..
Okay, that's all.
Nothing more to rant about (I think so)
Then, jyaa ^0^
Assalamualaikum
Monday, April 21, 2014
Tersebutlah kisah...
Assalamualaikum~
Hai... kenapa blog I bersawang ni? (ahakzz)
Tiba-tiba ber-I ni jadi pelik pulak.. hehe.. buang tebiat lama dah tak bukak blog kut.
Hari tu kan, 17/4 ada lah pergi UKCG kat IPG Kampus Kota Bharu, Pengkalan Chepa.
Bila dapat tahu dapat UKCG kat Kelantan ni je, syukur sangat sebab bila baca status orang lain kat FB, ada yang dapat luar Kelantan, jadi Alhamdulillah Allah tolong. Dan aku dapat subjek Pendidikan Khas yang merupakan 2nd choice, 1st choice adalah Pendidikan Awal Kanak-Kanak. Tapi aku tak kisah sangat asalkan boleh jadi cikgu.. Hehehe... Maybe I ada aura jadi cikgu yang diperturunkan oleh my dearest Walid. XD .. Hehe, boleh jadi. (Sebab ramai orang kata yang Walid ni memang aura cikgu-nya sangat menyerlah) hoho...
. Sebenarnya hari tu memang banyak rancangan, terutamanya my parents. On that day, my brother yang Form 2 ada kem memanah kat sekolah Walid, jadi nak mengantar tak sempat, so mintak tolong kawan Walid tolong hantar pergi sekolah. Dan hari tu juga sebelum pukul 10 nak kena ambik saudara yang datang dari Narathiwat nak dibawa ke pejabat tanah (adalah, urusan keluarga). Jadi hari tu memang sangat kelam kabut. Dahlah ujian mula pukul 12 tengah hari, dan nak kena ada kat situ 30 minutes early!Namun, secara tiba-tiba dan tak kena, I got my p***** dan ia menambah lagi kekalutan dengan benda tu tak bawak lagi. That's why I'm being a masochist*
Tapi dah rasa tak sempat sangat nak sampai, aku biorkan ajo!!! Ohohooho, sungguh menyeksa diri. *
Dalam hati ni dah gundah gulana, dok pikir "Alahai... sempat ke tak, nak pergi UKCG ni" . Mulut dah muncung, ngomel-ngomel sikit, keluh-mengeluh dan seangkatan dengannya. Umi pun cakaplah (nak pujuk) "kalau kita tolong orang, nanti Allah mudahkan urusan kita". Aku ni pun cubalah 'telan' kata pujukan tu, nak sedapkan hati. *Try to put your faith on Allah, can you?!* Nak cari tempat ni pun bukan main payah, adalah beberapa kali tu dok tawaf kawasan PC tu nak cari dimanakan bersinggah sananya sebuah istana yang bernama IPG ni. Akhirnya jumpa jugak, bila masuk je kawasan IPG kenalah pulak cari dewan dan... bermulah marathon tak rasmi ke dewan.
Sampai aje dekat dewan untuk ujian bertulis (dengan semua manusia yang ambil ujian tu dah siap sedia nak terkam kertas), terus aku menerpa masuk, cari tempat duduk berpandukan kertas yang ditampal kat luar dewan. Alhamdulillah, selesai jawab aku keluar cari Umi. Umi, nak susu, nak lampin, nak dukung~ Erk... camtulah lagaknya XD
Pastu kena tunggu pulak untuk Ujian Fizikal, pukul 3.15 petang. Aku termasuk dalam kelompok 2. Best sangat sebelum tu, aku jumpa ramai budak lain, kami kira peramah jugaklah, walaupun tak kenal, tapi tak lokek senyum, tak lokek pertolongan, dan tak lokek berkongsi pengalaman.
Sebelum masuk dewan untuk ujian tu, kena panaskan badan dulu dan diorang ada bagi kertas kecik. Masuk je dewan, diorang terangkan yang ada 6 tahap yang perlu lepas.
Tahap 1 - Ujian BMI (ukur tinggi dan berat badan)
Tahap 2 - Bangkit tubi (yang ni, aku tak boleh buat walaupun masa sebelum ni aku ada buat latihan, mungkin sebab asyik makan tidur lepas SPM, perut dah jadi macam mama Giant yang dalam cerita doraemon tu. Kalau yang dah kena PLKN mungkin senang kot..)
Tahap 3 - Lompat dalam petak selama seminit, dan tak boleh pijak garisan.
Tahap 4 - Berdiri dalam keadaan senam diri membelakangi dinding, lepas tu bongkokkan badan untuk sentuh lantai dan bangun semula untuk sentuh dinding kat belakang. (Yang ni kalau tak buat warm up memang sakit urat peha)
Tahap 5 - (ahhhhhhh!!! tak ingat yang ni!!)
Tahap 6 - Lari ulang alik, 20meter x 6-7kali. (Yaaahhh!!! yang ni paling penat dan menyeksa jiwa dan raga)
InsyaAllah semua tahap aku lepas kecuali yang bangkit tubi tu... Memang menyedihkan.... keaiban yang terbesar.. huhuu...
Akhirnya, berakhir jugak ujian tu, dan sampai kat rumah lepas Asar. Walaupun letih sangat sampai tahap boleh pengsan, aku bersyukur sangat sebab dapat pengalaman macam tu. Eventhough hari tu aku nak marah, gelisah, excited, letih, there are this people who stay with me until the end especially Umi. I really appreciate it.... I can't make it without you~ T.T seriously.... rasa cam budak darjah 1 balik. Umi teman sejak mula lagi, tunggu kat luar dewan dengan sabarnya.. Tak lupa juga to my Walid dan budak besar tu, Mc Ngoshhh@ Angah my brother yang menjadi driver XD. DOMO ARIGATOU GOZAIMASU~
Anata-tachi wa suggoku yasashi dayo~~~ Terharu nehh~ T,T
Umm... ummm.. lagi apa ehh?
Oh ya, tata~ Assalamualaikum..
jya nee~ ^_^
Hai... kenapa blog I bersawang ni? (ahakzz)
Tiba-tiba ber-I ni jadi pelik pulak.. hehe.. buang tebiat lama dah tak bukak blog kut.
Hari tu kan, 17/4 ada lah pergi UKCG kat IPG Kampus Kota Bharu, Pengkalan Chepa.
Bila dapat tahu dapat UKCG kat Kelantan ni je, syukur sangat sebab bila baca status orang lain kat FB, ada yang dapat luar Kelantan, jadi Alhamdulillah Allah tolong. Dan aku dapat subjek Pendidikan Khas yang merupakan 2nd choice, 1st choice adalah Pendidikan Awal Kanak-Kanak. Tapi aku tak kisah sangat asalkan boleh jadi cikgu.. Hehehe... Maybe I ada aura jadi cikgu yang diperturunkan oleh my dearest Walid. XD .. Hehe, boleh jadi. (Sebab ramai orang kata yang Walid ni memang aura cikgu-nya sangat menyerlah) hoho...
. Sebenarnya hari tu memang banyak rancangan, terutamanya my parents. On that day, my brother yang Form 2 ada kem memanah kat sekolah Walid, jadi nak mengantar tak sempat, so mintak tolong kawan Walid tolong hantar pergi sekolah. Dan hari tu juga sebelum pukul 10 nak kena ambik saudara yang datang dari Narathiwat nak dibawa ke pejabat tanah (adalah, urusan keluarga). Jadi hari tu memang sangat kelam kabut. Dahlah ujian mula pukul 12 tengah hari, dan nak kena ada kat situ 30 minutes early!Namun, secara tiba-tiba dan tak kena, I got my p***** dan ia menambah lagi kekalutan dengan benda tu tak bawak lagi. That's why I'm being a masochist*
Tapi dah rasa tak sempat sangat nak sampai, aku biorkan ajo!!! Ohohooho, sungguh menyeksa diri. *Dalam hati ni dah gundah gulana, dok pikir "Alahai... sempat ke tak, nak pergi UKCG ni" . Mulut dah muncung, ngomel-ngomel sikit, keluh-mengeluh dan seangkatan dengannya. Umi pun cakaplah (nak pujuk) "kalau kita tolong orang, nanti Allah mudahkan urusan kita". Aku ni pun cubalah 'telan' kata pujukan tu, nak sedapkan hati. *Try to put your faith on Allah, can you?!* Nak cari tempat ni pun bukan main payah, adalah beberapa kali tu dok tawaf kawasan PC tu nak cari dimanakan bersinggah sananya sebuah istana yang bernama IPG ni. Akhirnya jumpa jugak, bila masuk je kawasan IPG kenalah pulak cari dewan dan... bermulah marathon tak rasmi ke dewan.
Sampai aje dekat dewan untuk ujian bertulis (dengan semua manusia yang ambil ujian tu dah siap sedia nak terkam kertas), terus aku menerpa masuk, cari tempat duduk berpandukan kertas yang ditampal kat luar dewan. Alhamdulillah, selesai jawab aku keluar cari Umi. Umi, nak susu, nak lampin, nak dukung~ Erk... camtulah lagaknya XD
Pastu kena tunggu pulak untuk Ujian Fizikal, pukul 3.15 petang. Aku termasuk dalam kelompok 2. Best sangat sebelum tu, aku jumpa ramai budak lain, kami kira peramah jugaklah, walaupun tak kenal, tapi tak lokek senyum, tak lokek pertolongan, dan tak lokek berkongsi pengalaman.
Sebelum masuk dewan untuk ujian tu, kena panaskan badan dulu dan diorang ada bagi kertas kecik. Masuk je dewan, diorang terangkan yang ada 6 tahap yang perlu lepas.
Tahap 1 - Ujian BMI (ukur tinggi dan berat badan)
Tahap 2 - Bangkit tubi (yang ni, aku tak boleh buat walaupun masa sebelum ni aku ada buat latihan, mungkin sebab asyik makan tidur lepas SPM, perut dah jadi macam mama Giant yang dalam cerita doraemon tu. Kalau yang dah kena PLKN mungkin senang kot..)
Tahap 3 - Lompat dalam petak selama seminit, dan tak boleh pijak garisan.
Tahap 4 - Berdiri dalam keadaan senam diri membelakangi dinding, lepas tu bongkokkan badan untuk sentuh lantai dan bangun semula untuk sentuh dinding kat belakang. (Yang ni kalau tak buat warm up memang sakit urat peha)
Tahap 5 - (ahhhhhhh!!! tak ingat yang ni!!)
Tahap 6 - Lari ulang alik, 20meter x 6-7kali. (Yaaahhh!!! yang ni paling penat dan menyeksa jiwa dan raga)
InsyaAllah semua tahap aku lepas kecuali yang bangkit tubi tu... Memang menyedihkan.... keaiban yang terbesar.. huhuu...
Akhirnya, berakhir jugak ujian tu, dan sampai kat rumah lepas Asar. Walaupun letih sangat sampai tahap boleh pengsan, aku bersyukur sangat sebab dapat pengalaman macam tu. Eventhough hari tu aku nak marah, gelisah, excited, letih, there are this people who stay with me until the end especially Umi. I really appreciate it.... I can't make it without you~ T.T seriously.... rasa cam budak darjah 1 balik. Umi teman sejak mula lagi, tunggu kat luar dewan dengan sabarnya.. Tak lupa juga to my Walid dan budak besar tu, Mc Ngoshhh@ Angah my brother yang menjadi driver XD. DOMO ARIGATOU GOZAIMASU~
Anata-tachi wa suggoku yasashi dayo~~~ Terharu nehh~ T,T
Oh ya, tata~ Assalamualaikum..
jya nee~ ^_^
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Kecil-kecil dulu kan...
Assalamualaikum~
Hai..
Kali ni nak cerita masa zaman budak dulu.
Masa kecil, Umi dan Walid adalah idola aku yang sangat aku sayangi. Sebab kecil lagi, jadi aku ingat semua orang dewasa macam Umi dan Walid. Baik, tak pernah tipu orang, tak suka tabur fitnah, penyayang dan sebagainya. Masa tu, aku rasakan yang orang dewasa ni adalah sempurna.
Masa kecil - kecil dulu, aku ingat semua orang bila besar akan jadi orang baik, selalu solat dan macam-macam lagi tak kira la masa kecik dia tu nakal ke, jahat sikit ke . Hehe..
Memang tak terlintas lansung yang seorang kanak-kanak yang kecil tu bila besar boleh jadi macam macam, tak kira baik atau jahat.
Satu lagi, kecil-kecil dulu kan, aku ingat semua orang kenal Walid sebab masa dalam kereta, kadang-kadang Walid akan hon dekat kenderaan tertentu *maknanya yang Walid kenal*. Oleh sebab tu, aku rasa yang orang dewasa ni sangat-sangat baik.
Tapi bila aku baca surat khabar/majalah/buku, masa umur 9 tahun, aku terkejut baca fakta yang ramai orang Islam tak solat, buat jenayah dan lain-lain. Masa umur tu lah, pandangan aku tentang dunia luar berubah. Aku tak percaya pada orang dewasa selain Umi dan Walid. Aku rasa yang mereka cuma pura-pura baik.
Okey, tu masa aku umur 9 tahun. Bila masuk tingkatan 1, sekali lagi aku tukar pandangan. Rupa-rupanya, tak semua orang dewasa hipokrit. Aku belajar tentang baik dan buruknya dunia luar. Tetap, aku takut untuk ke dunia sana sampai sekarang.
Aku takut kalau -kalau aku berubah jadi orang dewasa yang buruk sifatnya. Okey, sekarang pun sedang mendisiplinkan diri walaupun kadang- kadang terkeluar jugak sikap tak berapa baiknya.
Aku nak buang sikap malas, penakut, baran, tak bersyukur dan macam-macam lagi. Aku rasa sangat teruk bila aku marah budak-budak walaupun memang panas hati sangat-sangat. Aku jadi lupa yang sifat budak-budak memang macam tu. Aktif, degil sikit. Tapi masa tu aku jadi kurang sifat belas, mungkin terpengaruh dengan sikap ibu bapa budak tu sendiri. Aku jadi teringat dan rasa nak mengungkit bila teringatkan tentang tanggungjawab.
Perkara yang selalu aku ungkitkan dalam diri ialah "Kenapa aku kena jaga budak-budak ni sedang kan diorang ada mak ayah? Diorang bukannya anak yatim nak kena serah pada orang lain. Bila rumah tangga dah goyah, anak-anak terbengkalai. Baik tak payah kawin kalau buat menyusahkan orang saja !" Okey, aku mengaku agak kasar sikit, tapi untuk tak fikir macam tu memang agak susah.
Tapi, Umi selalu pesan supaya sabar dengan kerenah budak-budak sebab mereka ialah ahli syurga. "Kalau nak dekat dengan syurga layanlah ahli syurga." Okey, itu nasihatnya.
Tapi untuk amalkannya, rasa susah sangat. Entahlah....
Kadang-kadang aku bayangkan jugak budak-budak ni bila 10-20 tahun akan datang. Layanan aku masa sekarang, macam mana mereka akan tafsirkan nanti. Macam mana diorang akan jadi bila aku tetap macam ni. Mungkin pandangannya tentang orang dewasa dan dunia luar adalah sebaliknya yang pernah aku tafsirkan masa kecil.
Yup, masa kecil aku penuh dengan kasih sayang ibu bapa. Tapi, diorang? Kecil-kecil dah berpisah dengan ibu dan ayah. Layanan orang lain, sebaik mana pun, atau segarang mana pun, tak sama dengan ibu dan ayah tak?
Okeylah. Setakat tu je, assalamualaikum~
May Allah bless you!
Hai..
Kali ni nak cerita masa zaman budak dulu.
Masa kecil, Umi dan Walid adalah idola aku yang sangat aku sayangi. Sebab kecil lagi, jadi aku ingat semua orang dewasa macam Umi dan Walid. Baik, tak pernah tipu orang, tak suka tabur fitnah, penyayang dan sebagainya. Masa tu, aku rasakan yang orang dewasa ni adalah sempurna.
Masa kecil - kecil dulu, aku ingat semua orang bila besar akan jadi orang baik, selalu solat dan macam-macam lagi tak kira la masa kecik dia tu nakal ke, jahat sikit ke . Hehe..
Memang tak terlintas lansung yang seorang kanak-kanak yang kecil tu bila besar boleh jadi macam macam, tak kira baik atau jahat.
Satu lagi, kecil-kecil dulu kan, aku ingat semua orang kenal Walid sebab masa dalam kereta, kadang-kadang Walid akan hon dekat kenderaan tertentu *maknanya yang Walid kenal*. Oleh sebab tu, aku rasa yang orang dewasa ni sangat-sangat baik.
Tapi bila aku baca surat khabar/majalah/buku, masa umur 9 tahun, aku terkejut baca fakta yang ramai orang Islam tak solat, buat jenayah dan lain-lain. Masa umur tu lah, pandangan aku tentang dunia luar berubah. Aku tak percaya pada orang dewasa selain Umi dan Walid. Aku rasa yang mereka cuma pura-pura baik.
Okey, tu masa aku umur 9 tahun. Bila masuk tingkatan 1, sekali lagi aku tukar pandangan. Rupa-rupanya, tak semua orang dewasa hipokrit. Aku belajar tentang baik dan buruknya dunia luar. Tetap, aku takut untuk ke dunia sana sampai sekarang.
Aku takut kalau -kalau aku berubah jadi orang dewasa yang buruk sifatnya. Okey, sekarang pun sedang mendisiplinkan diri walaupun kadang- kadang terkeluar jugak sikap tak berapa baiknya.
Aku nak buang sikap malas, penakut, baran, tak bersyukur dan macam-macam lagi. Aku rasa sangat teruk bila aku marah budak-budak walaupun memang panas hati sangat-sangat. Aku jadi lupa yang sifat budak-budak memang macam tu. Aktif, degil sikit. Tapi masa tu aku jadi kurang sifat belas, mungkin terpengaruh dengan sikap ibu bapa budak tu sendiri. Aku jadi teringat dan rasa nak mengungkit bila teringatkan tentang tanggungjawab.
Perkara yang selalu aku ungkitkan dalam diri ialah "Kenapa aku kena jaga budak-budak ni sedang kan diorang ada mak ayah? Diorang bukannya anak yatim nak kena serah pada orang lain. Bila rumah tangga dah goyah, anak-anak terbengkalai. Baik tak payah kawin kalau buat menyusahkan orang saja !" Okey, aku mengaku agak kasar sikit, tapi untuk tak fikir macam tu memang agak susah.
Tapi, Umi selalu pesan supaya sabar dengan kerenah budak-budak sebab mereka ialah ahli syurga. "Kalau nak dekat dengan syurga layanlah ahli syurga." Okey, itu nasihatnya.
Tapi untuk amalkannya, rasa susah sangat. Entahlah....
Kadang-kadang aku bayangkan jugak budak-budak ni bila 10-20 tahun akan datang. Layanan aku masa sekarang, macam mana mereka akan tafsirkan nanti. Macam mana diorang akan jadi bila aku tetap macam ni. Mungkin pandangannya tentang orang dewasa dan dunia luar adalah sebaliknya yang pernah aku tafsirkan masa kecil.
Yup, masa kecil aku penuh dengan kasih sayang ibu bapa. Tapi, diorang? Kecil-kecil dah berpisah dengan ibu dan ayah. Layanan orang lain, sebaik mana pun, atau segarang mana pun, tak sama dengan ibu dan ayah tak?
Okeylah. Setakat tu je, assalamualaikum~
May Allah bless you!
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